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Duke boys on a budget
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Bowel Lunging Movements, quite sure of it.
This GMC would be funny if it wasn't true;) |
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LMAO...... A 6 year old and a 4 year old are raking the yard. The 6 year old asks, "You know what? I think it's about time we started learning to cuss."The 4 year old nods his head in approval. The 6 year old continues,"When we go in for breakfast, I'm gonna say something with hell and you say something with ass." The 4 year old agrees with enthusiasm. When the mother walks into the kitchen and asks the 6 year old what he wants for breakfast, he replies, "Aw, hell, Mom, I guess I'll have some Cheerios. WHACK! He flies out of his chair, tumbles across the kitchen floor, gets up,and runs upstairs crying his eyes out, with his mother in hot pursuit,slapping his rear with every step. His mom locks him in his room and shouts, "You can stay there until I let you out!" She then comes back downstairs, looks at the 4 year old and asks with a stern voice, "And what do YOU want for breakfast, young man?" "I don't know," he blubbers, "but you can bet your fat ass it won't be Cheerios!"
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:lol::lol: Reminds me of Little Johnny jokes... A teacher asks her class, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" Little Johnny says "I wanna be a billionaire, going to the most expensive clubs, take the best ***** with me, give her a Ferrari worth over a million bucks, an apartment in Hawaii, a mansion in Paris, a jet to travel through Europe, an Infinite Visa Card and to make love to her three times a day". The teacher, shocked, and not knowing what to do with the bad behavior of the child, decides not to give importance to what he said and then continues the lesson. "And you, Susie? " the teacher asks. Susie says "I wanna be Johnny's *****." ______________________________________________________________________________________ A new teacher was trying to make use of her psychology courses. She started her class by saying, "Everyone who thinks they're stupid, stand up!" After a few seconds, Little Johnny stood up. The teacher said, "Do you think you're stupid, Little Johnny?" "No, ma'am, but I hate to see you standing there all by yourself!" |
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This is horrible, but I still laughed-
Judge: How could you kill 24 people? What is wrong with you? Driver: I was driving at 50mph when I saw two men crossing the road. On the roadside, there was a restaurant with outside seating. I wanted to apply the brakes, but I realized they were not working. So I had to take a decision: Either hit the 2 men or run into the restaurant. Judge: Hit the 2 men of course! Driver: Exactly! After hitting the first man, the other man ran inside the restaurant so l followed him. |
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An 89 year old Ron Chester was stopped by the police around 2 a.m. and was asked where he was going at that time of night. Ron replied, "I'm on my way to a lecture about alcohol abuse and the effects it has on the human body, as well as smoking and staying out late." The officer asked, "Really? Who's giving that lecture at this time of night?" Ron replied, "That would be my wife. . |
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When one human body locks-lips (joins the intake ports) w/another human body, the exit port to exit port distance is quite long :lol: |
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Why is a hemorrhoid called a hemorrhoid and an asteroid called an asteroid?
Shouldn't it be the other way around? |
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Because then you would be pooping rocks, which wouldn't be an improvement. ;)
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It's not a pretty sight. :mel: |
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OMG! You're a rock star. :lol:
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It all makes sense, now. We had a new toilet put in at the rental house. The box showed a picture of a bunch of golf balls, which the toilet could still flush out of the bowl. Paul, did they base their design on your "input" (output)? :D
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I asked my wife what she wanted for her birthday? She said. "An outhouse'. I asked why. I told her that she would never use an outhouse. She said that she never would use it but I damn sure better. :( |
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A guy walks into a bar. There is a very fat girl in a short skirt dancing on a table.
He looks at her and says. Hey great legs. She smiles. Do you really think so? Sure. He nods. Most tables would have collapsed by now. |
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Happy Monday
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^ Well, the cage probably will protect him. :lol:
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WTF? Why is that guy in a cage to pump up a tire? I'm lost.
Just stick the hose in and take you chances. Like I did with his sister. |
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You never worked on those big tires, especially split rims? If you put the ring on wrong, it can come apart and kill you. Thus, the cage. The tire and wheel are supposed to be inside the cage. Maybe he just got back from a gulag?
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Tires are like women. I know nothing about them other than that they need to be replaced every few years. |
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