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:mm::ito:

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Don't be technical.......:lol:

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Technical or technicol?

K

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Ah geeeez!:dohh:! :lol:

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Lawyers should never ask a Georgia grandma a question if they aren't prepared for the answer.
In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know me?' She responded, 'Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you'll never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you.'
The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?'
She again replied, 'Why yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him.'
The defense attorney nearly died.
The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and, in a very quiet voice, said,
'If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I'll send you both to the electric chair...!!

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Naps

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Power outage.
And reading the interwebs by lantern ain’t working out so far.

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.

I have one of these devices...

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Love it...I have that same device!

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Looking at that made me think..I can't remember the last time I drove a vehicle with 3 peddles. My last one was a '92ish Ford pickup that I leased for 2 years.

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^ ^ ^

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:agree:









.

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[QUOTE=Getter-Done;8931488]:agree:


I too think this is not a funny joke ..

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Mikey ! "Give it to Mikey, he HATES everything , How old is he now ? :lol:


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vYEXzx-TINc

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Longevity?

1. The inventor of the treadmill died at the age of 54

2. The inventor of gymnastics died at the age of 57

3. The world bodybuilding champion died at the age of 41

4. The best footballer in the world Maradona, died at the age of 60.

5. James Fuller Fixx credited with helping start America's fitness revolution by popularizing the sport of running died of a heart attack while jogging at 52 years of age

BUT

6. The KFC inventor died at 94.

7. Inventor of Nutella brand died at the age of 88

8. Imagine, cigarette maker Winston died at the age of 102

9. The inventor of opium died at the age of 116 in an earthquake

10. And the Hennessey Liquor inventor died at 98.


How did doctors come to the conclusion that exercise prolongs life?

The rabbit is always jumping up and down but it lives for only 2 years and the turtle that doesn't exercise at all, lives 400 years.

So, take some rest, chill, stay cool, eat, drink, smoke, and enjoy your life. :smoke:

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My thoughts exactly!

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That's my motto and I've outlived two of my doctors. And they were pretty young too.

Maybe they should have taken my advice and said Fck it. Do what you want.

If you want to eat Kale and drink sparkling water then god bless you if it makes you feel better. For myself. I'll take a slice of greasy pizza and a beer.

When your numbers up. It's up.

Joke thread..Time for a joke.

A guy meets a hooker.
She tells him "I'll do things that your wife wont do.
He says great.. And hands her his laundry.

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Since diet seems to be a topic…

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That is the truth..Is that yellow one yours??