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:lol: :lol:

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just be careful of exploding silicone:lol:

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I have tried this.

It works 50% of the time. ;)

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But did you remember why you were going there? :lol:

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dog

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:lol::lol:

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Dog's name? Hulk, you wouldn't like him when he's angry. :lol:

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:lol: So True! Here's one of my son's dog that couldn't quite make her escape. Shoulders couldn't fit through. I used a Come-Along to spread two stiles and then lifted her up and out.

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Meow.

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Because Racecar

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Cheap houseboat. Am I right?

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Crack?

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Dang it Boog, I might never be able to unsee that! :lol:

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This is not Fair. :lol::haha::rolleyes::haha::bann::haha:

You must have had the Richard 2717 Training Course.

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Old school joke no pictures needed.

The symphony orchestra was performing Beethoven’s Ninth. In the piece there’s a long passage, about 20 minutes, during which the bass violinists have nothing to do. Rather than sitting around bored for 20 minutes, some of the bassists decided to sneak offstage to the lobby bar and have a quick one.

After slamming several drinks in quick succession, one of them looked at his watch and said, “Hey! We need to get back!”.
“No need to panic,” said a fellow bassist. “I thought we might need some extra time, so I tied the last few pages of the conductor’s score together with string. It’ll take him a few minutes to get it untangled.”

A few moments later they staggered back to the stage and took their places in the orchestra. About this time, a member of the audience noticed the conductor seemed a bit edgy and said as much to her companion.

“Well, of course,” said her companion. “Don’t you see? It’s the bottom of the Ninth, the score is tied, and the bassists are loaded.”

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wee

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Oooops!

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The other night I was invited out for a night with the “girls.” I told my husband that I would be home by midnight, “I promise!” Well, the hours passed and the margaritas went down way too easily. Around 3 a.m., a bit loaded, I headed for home. Just as I got in the door, the cuckoo clock in the hallway started up and cuckooed 3 times.
Quickly, realising my husband would probably wake up, I cuckooed another 9 times. I was really proud of myself for coming up with such a quick-witted solution, in order to escape a possible conflict with him. (Even when totally smashed… 3 cuckoos plus 9 cuckoos totals 12 cuckoos = MIDNIGHT !)
The next morning my husband asked me what time I got in, I told him “MIDNIGHT”… he didn’t seem pissed off in the least. Whew, I got away with that one! Then he said “We need a new cuckoo clock.” When I asked him why, he said, “Well, last night our clock cuckooed three times, then said “oh ****” Cuckooed 4 more times, cleared its throat, cuckooed another three times, giggled, cuckooed twice more, and then tripped over the coffee table and farted.

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I spotted a burglar in the house
I shined a red dot on his chest.
The cat took care of the rest.

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Hahaha

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Hilarious!!! Beer out my nose!

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