Selfish a** ?
 

I am about to build my shop , 28x28 and attached 14x32 parking garage
also for bikes , lawn tools etc..
here's my dilema I want "my zone" but to do so I would have to tell the
wife and kids (3) KEEP OUT and that don't feel right , but I don't want to
search for my own dang tools or break my neck on a skateboard left
any ol place .
My family is still pretty new got married in oct. 05 I have 1 she has 2
wondering if I should just deal with it , let happen whatever happens
or risk being putting a wedge between me and the fam which I don't want
I just want putter alone time
whats worked or not worked for you all ?

Re: Selfish a** ?
 

well if your building a seperate shop, other than the parking garage ... then just put a locked door on it, say the shops mine keep out... thats respectable

Re: Selfish a** ?
 

Why not take the time to show the little ones what tools are actually used for as well as how to take care of them. Teach them to put them back where they found them. That would go a long way to keep the peace as opposed to just saying "Keep Out."

Re: Selfish a** ?
 

I have an area dedicated to every one else’s junk in my shop because they are pack rats and don’t know when enough is enough. What ever is not in that boundary goes in the trash. They have learned that I am a man of my word.
My kids are already grown and they are still as messy as if they where toddlers, my wife complains and yells at them.....I only say it once, second time I see it..... it goes in the trash.

I always tell my adult children... this is your home for as long as you want but its my house......learn the diffrence.

Re: Selfish a** ?
 

Have a sit down and set the rules now, before it is built, so that, hopefully, the whole family will be on the same page through the build, and after it is done. Seems as good of a time as any to teach the kids about proper use, and care of, tools and equipment, as well as safety.

Re: Selfish a** ?
 

Telling them to keep out is a shure fire way to drive a huge wedge between you. I have been married for 18 years to my wife who had 2 boys befor we got married and I had 2 boys and a girl not living with me at the time. It is best not to have your "ZONE", because you do not want your wife feeling like she is not welcome in your life while you are there. Wether you mean that or not, that is the message that you are sending. My wife gets offended when I tell her that she needs her own time away from the family to do things that makes her happy. Her thing is bowling and I don't like the sport, so I choose not to go and that hurts her feelings. It is alright to have time on your own where you don't have any interuptions from the outside world, but I wouldn't make it off limits. Not if you want to stay married anyway or at the very least have something that she will want to argu with you time and time again about. WES

Re: Selfish a** ?
 

Most dads go through this . If the shop is for your space alone , Then mention that to your spouse. She is reasonable as females go. There will be a trade off. You buy her something she lets you have your personal space.Has to be a trade off somewhere, or as Shane said have a training session. Good luck and enjoy your shop.

Re: Selfish a** ?
 

Build your shop, and set the rules, but do not exclude any family members, especially your wife. When it is new everyone will want to share in the new space, but as time goes on they probably won't care much about your space especially if there are clean up after yourself rules involved. Lock your tools and get the kids some tools of their own. If they abuse their own, then the possibility of using yours goes down the tubes unless you are present. The space will eventually be all yours, it may just take some time.

Re: Selfish a** ?
 

I think bobthecop and Classic heartbeat have the plan.The shop should have rules and everyone should know them.Since you are the senior mechanic and probably have a better idea of safety rules etc. you are the obvious choice for setting the rules there.As a way to show everyone they are a part of the family have them help with planning the organization and decor of the parking garage.Do some creative stuff in the parking garage,I saw a guy who had hung the lawn tools to spell out the families last name,put some shelving in and give each of the kids a shelf or two and label it for their personal stuff.
If any of them want to share time in the shop make sure they have a project they are expected to work on and complete.A friends dad taught his brothers to mechanic by dumping a junk engine outside the shop door.If they wanted to hang around the shop they had to work on disassembling that engine.The two of them had torn down 6-8 engines between ages 6-12.Don't hang the bikes on hooks,you will constantly be going to get one down for the smaller kids.Keep things simple and keep a list of chores,dumping the trash,sweeping the floor,dusting the shelves,and such,.Use a rotating schedule so they keep the parking garage and they will feel a sense of pride in keeping that area nice.
Just some suggestions,everyone has to come to their own arrangement.Probably best to sit down and discuss what you are wanting and how best to deal with the situation with the Mrs.so that you and her are on the same page.Hope it works out well.

Re: Selfish a** ?
 

I agree with several...
Make the rules. "Keep Out" is a little much. If the rules are broken, then the keep out sign comes out.
My 3 kids put all their stuff in the garage, it bothers me I don't have much room, maybe one day a shop. The kids know not to touch daddy's truck or his tools, they ask first, everything else is fair game.

Re: Selfish a** ?
 

Yep , pretty sure upfront restrictions are the way to go
that way no one is excluded and I love my family I want them around , just
not all the time. But hey my time with them is short .Oldest almost 18 ,
youngest almost 10 .
so they all know about putting stuff back , they (like me when I was a kid)
just don't
I can see having some fun together , with careful boundries
there were so many cool things mentioned I can't reply to all of them but
THANKS , Brad

Re: Selfish a** ?
 

well sounds like youve got your plan and i wish you luck with it

Re: Selfish a** ?
 

I've been going through something similar the last year or so, my 2 older boys are getting interrested in tools and such, have been for awhile, but now they got on a destructive streak. The other day while I was at work, they snagged a claw hammer and proceded to beat the crap out of the fenders on our motorhome...I was not a happy camper!!! Now there are locks on the doors on the shop, all the tools stay in their places, nothing gets left in the yard to find with the mower, the vehicles don't get trashed, the kids are safer because they are only allowed to be in there when I am.

BTW, I gave my wife a key so she can still put air in her tires if she needs to.

Re: Selfish a** ?
 

In middle school and high school I had a best friend whose dad locked his tool boxes. No one but him were allowed in them. I didn't think twice about it. It didn't seem like a big deal.

Re: Selfish a** ?
 

explain to the kids how your shop is to you what their bedroom is to them. a place for others to respect personal space. if that makes sense.

as for tools; my oldest is 9 and he is on the road to tool respect. I charge him $.25 for each offense.

I like the "here, tear this engine down if you want to be out here" concept. nothing like cutting their teeth gradually.

Re: Selfish a** ?
 

:four: My son is almost 5 and I make him put the tools back. He takes the wrong tool and trys to fix something on my motorcycle or truck but he means well.. When I see him put the tool down I make him put it in the box and he dose.. Just the other day I was washing the front of my motorcycle (lots of bugs from out 3 day trip) so I could put some accesories on. He wanted to soap up the bike but I was kinda done and I know what he would have done, so I made him get his bike and wash that and he had a good time doing it with dad. He is still a pain the butt when he is in there with me but I treasure these moments as he will not be ths age forever.. Instead of getting mad I just watch and take it in... He dose some goofy stuff too... The pictures shows my new accesories. A headlight and oil cooler cover.. And in the second picture you can see he started helping at an early age. He was about 18 months when he just picked up the other end of a 2x4 and helpped move it..

Re: Selfish a** ?
 

If your wife is anything like my fiance, she already has total control of the house, so claiming control of the garage, in my opinion, is totally allowable.

Re: Selfish a** ?
 

:metal: My exact view on this situation too!!:cool:

I love having my little helper with me in the garage. (Daughter - 3 years old) Sometimes she can be a handful with dragging all the tools out, and the "what's this?" and "what's that?" but if you take the time to tell them and explain what it's for, you'd be amazed how much they sponge up. Then the next time they know if they can touch it or not. I like to listen to my daughter talking to herself in the garage, "I'm not allowed to touch this because daddy says it's sharp, but I can play with this tool" as she proceeds to "fix" her bike! :lol:

Re: Selfish a** ?
 

You want PUTTER time??? I guess we could just sit and shoot the crap, but it will have to be on nights & weekends (free minutes). You can ask my wife what has worked for her in terms of quality Putter time.:tms:

Re: Selfish a** ?
 

:haha: :haha: :haha:
You ain't right...but you not wrong much either!

Re: Selfish a** ?
 

I can't really think of a good responce to that !

Re: Selfish a** ?
 

It doesn't work that way. This is where women think different than men. Putting a lock on the door, hanging a keep out sign, or even saying please leave my tools alone is asking for trouble with most women. Having to track down a tool every now and then isn't that bad, and it beats having to live in the garage or paying child support.

Re: Selfish a** ?
 

There MUST be a way for us dudes to make the wimmenz think it was THEIR idea in the first place. Then you just "grudgingly" agree, and voila, problem solved

Re: Selfish a** ?
 

THAT is excactly what I did! I agreed we would buy this house as long as the garage was ALL MINE. we both agreed our next house will have 2 garages.

Re: Selfish a** ?
 

:haha: You were what I thought of when I saw that :lol:

Our garage is sort of like a family room....We all end up in there it seems...The kids know they aren't supposed to play in there, and Dad's tools are off limits when he or I aren't around....But it was a blast having them all out there with wire brushs cleaning off the frame of the truck during the rebuild. It is sometimes cause for extra long baths :lol: but it's a lot of fun.
Besides, centsless can't keep me out of there...I have to go in to retrieve my tools he's hi-jacked from the house ;)

And I'd rather hang out in the garage than the house anyday....