Reasons to keep your spouse out of your truck

[Sillyoldman]

I thought it would be fun to post funny truck related experiences & mishaps partly due to being married. I'll start with mine.

It's been years ago, but I remember it like yesterday. One morning while my wife was at work, and we were new to our neighborhood I decided to get to work on my Jeep. Being a new home owner I was in need of adaquate tools. I had enough basics to get myself in some trouble though. At the time I had a Wagoneer with 33" tires and a CJ-7 with 32"'s. It made sense to me that a tire swap was a good thing to do. First I removed the 33's from the wagoneer, then the 32's from the CJ. When I rolled the 33's to the CJ I realized it would need to raised a bit more. It was sitting on a very reliable scissor jack. I knew better than to get under the jeep, so i scrapped together every ratchet extension I had. While lying on my side behind the vehicle I began raising it. Thats when the trusty old scissor jack fell, as did the jeep. I quickly realized I was not out of harms way as the trailer hitch came down on my left shoulder and took out all of my air. I fought to get out and somehow I did. My neighbor heard my groan as my air pushed out. As I ran around my front yard trying to breath the neighbor called 911. I followed by making a call of my own. The operater asked if I were bleeding. I replied "no". She then asked if I had any bones protruding. I replied "no". I was then told that I need to find my own way to the ER. They had nobody available to come for me. I asked for directions to the nearest hospital. Finally, here is where my '71 chevy comes in to play. As I struggled to breathe because of a whole bunch of broken ribs. Me and my dangling dislocated shoulder painfully prepared for a trip to the hospital. The Chevy was the only rig I had with wheels. I got in and saw that there was no gas in it! My goodness thats why my wife did'nt take it this morning. Yes it is all her fault. I stopped at the nearest AMPM, and endured the line, prepay and pain. I got fixed up after the 8 mile drive. When I was recovered the wife and I went to costco. I had to see the tool section. My wife asked if I could use a floor roller jack and some stands. I told her "yes" and I never had a problem buying another tool since.

Admitingly I am the biggest bonehead at the time, but baby could'nt you have put at least two bucks in?
__________________
'71 Custom Deluxe C-20. Bone stock with BB402, Hydramatic 400, wood bed and side storage box.

[67 SS]

Not long after we got married,my wife and mother-in-law went to town in my old 70 chevy.I forgot(I swear I did) to remind them that the inside passenger door handle would sometimes stick up in the open position.Yep,the wife made a hard left turn and the door flew open.The MIL managed to stay in the truck and still refuses to ride in it again. No,the truck isn't for sale!

[Lemield]

Originally Posted by 67 SS

Not long after we got married,my wife and mother-in-law went to town in my old 70 chevy.I forgot(I swear I did) to remind them that the inside passenger door handle would sometimes stick up in the open position.Yep,the wife made a hard left turn and the door flew open.The MIL managed to stay in the truck and still refuses to ride in it again. No,the truck isn't for sale!

It's not for sale because it's PRICELESS!!

[farside847]

When I offered to teach her how to drive it, and she asked what the "other" pedal was for.... (its a 3 on the tree and she thought it was an auo I guess)

needless to say that was the end of the lesson

[68w/sbc406]

i dont have anything bad to add to this, but my gf is usually a slow driver, so i figure i can let her borrow my truck to go to the store (its 4 blocks away) so i am standing outside with her parents as she leaves. she makes the right turn then goes to the stop sign......... im like wtf??? she hasnt driven it alone again

[jamis]

I dont like my wife riding in my truck anymore, her and my girlfriend cant get along my girlfriend being any of my toys she claims I pay more attention to then her.

[JIMs70GMC]

My wife had to take my GMC to pick the kids up from school. She never shifted out of 2nd gear! My 7 yr old kept telling her what to do and she putted along going about 20mph! My son reminds her of that anytime she gets in the truck, "Mommy's not aloud to drive Daddy's trucks".

[old Rusty C10]

my wife was the worst when it came to my trucks every time she got in it or tried to drive it it was nothing but a headache cause she would whine and complain about something. Now the wife is gone and ive got a great girlfriend... and does she ever look extra sexy driving my trucks!!

[Rdub]

New guy here, been hanging out and gathering up a lot of really great information on this board..... you guys are the best! In the post from old rusty, he mentions his girlfriend looking great in his truck. A few months ago the 67 - 72 chevy bug bit and I decided I needed one in a 4X4. Looked at one here locally and my GF said I should buy it becasue I looked good in it, well I'm a shopper and the next weekend I put about 800 miles on my car looking at rigs all over the state (Oregon), even went to Seattle.... all were in decent shape but all had their little problems. When it came right down to it I did a little truck ranking evaluation form based on price and associated costs to fix various problems... and I probably don't need to tell you which one I bought. So, next time you're in a truck buying mode, be sure to get your wife's or girlfriend's opinion on what you look like when you're sittin in it. Might save a lot of time.

[phlegm]

I don’t have a spouse story yet, this kind of qualifies as she was involved. Here is how I almost killed my daughter.

One Saturday my wife insisted so I took my 3.5 yr old daughter with me to Lowes. She LOVES my truck and is always excited to go for a ride. No air bags so I just put the kiddie seat in the bench pull the belt tight and go. Well on the way out of Lowes, the sun had come out and truck had warmed up. My AC is a little slow to catch up (hey it’s older then I am) so I rolled down my window while sitting at the stoplight. Just as we pull out and turn left my daughter reaches down to roll her window down and pulls the door handle. Door flies open and she starts sliding down the seat belt. I hit the clutch and grab the bottom of the carseat with my right hand and pull her back in before she goes all the way out. She and I are freaking out at this pt. I idle over to the shoulder and get the door shut.

Wow, she has not touched that door latch again, and now asks for the window to be rolled down but will not touch it herself.

Advice for all the other newbs that were too young to remember how locks worked back then: if the door is locked it will not open until you pull up the latch, had I locked this would have never happened as she cannot reach behind the seat to un-latch it.

[chevyboy55]

Mine is not a spouse story, it's a sister in law story. My sister in law needed to borrow a vehicle. Well being the nice guy (read that SUCKER!) that I am, I said she could borrow my truck. I got a phone call about an hour later from her & she said my truck broke down, (I put a new motor in it about 1000 miles before that), I asked her what it was doing when it died. I told her I wanted to figgure out what tools I would need to bring. She said I needed to bring oil, I said oil? what do you mean oil? She said, "ya, it's running out the bottom of the truck out onto the freeway". Needless to say I left the tools & called a wrecker. When I got there I opened the hood & pulled a connecting rod out through the rather large hole in the side of the pan! Seems she had it in 2nd instead of drive. (Made it about 25 or so miles) She said it was making a real loud clanging noise before it quit.(ya reckon?) No, she has never driven, nor will she ever drive one of my vehicles, I don't think I'd let her ride my bicycle. I can laugh about it now cause it's been 20yrs ago.

[CHEVYE]

i had to buy a new radiator because of the mrs. last week. i took her car to work for overtime one day so she decides to take my truck shopping. i get home and my 84 is gone. i was freaking out. it had a little leak in the radiator, (i know i should've fixed it but i knew it was there) anyway needless to say, she didn't top it off when she went out. she got home and steam was rolling out from under the hood. she split the whole side of it out. good thing she only went 2 miles or she probably would've killed the engine too.

[A.P.]

My wife took my truck to work because here min-van was in the shop getting a tranny job. For three days she had no problems, and she was starting to like to drive my truck. On the fourth day while she was driving back from work, she calls me on her cell phone and tells me that the truck doesn't want to run. That shes been driven for while and that the truck seems to be forcing itselft to move foward. I asked her if the engine was dying, and she said no. So than I asked her to check the hand brakes. And occurs that was the problem. Well after that day my wife has been prohibited from touching my truck.

[69 longhorn]

4.10 gears, & a tight Eaton, make "donut land" fast,while standing on the throttle in the corner! As long as that old truck is, she didnt hit anything, but she scared the crap out of the oldest brat(he was riding with).......& lets just say a pic of the look on her face would have been worth at least a couple thousand words! From here on, if I need a drive by to listen to the exhaust......the keys are dropped into the oldest kids hands L

[R@nger]

ROFL these stories are killin me. This is a great thread!

I have one but its not near as bad as any of these lol. Suprisingly its about my dad too lol. Every time he drives my truck he forgets to take the parking brake off. He loves to drive the truck but I have to remind him every time to take the the e-brake off. I wasn't paying attention one day when he was driving it and we went from our house all the way down the street with him shouting, "wheres this things balls...come on is this all you've got???, this is pathetic, this is just stupid." about that time I looked at him and said..."dad I think my truck would appreciate it if you took off the parking brake and stopped verbally abusing her." He looked at me chuckled and said, "ooohhhh".

[pritch]

My wife and I met in a bar. She said she needed a ride home so I said sure, but you gotta drive 'cause I was way to drunk. At the time I had a '67 C-10 W/ three on the tree-one of the good ones that jammed between 1st & 2nd every time you didn't pay strict attention. The whole time she drove, she never missed a shift. I knew then she was a keeper.

But she did have a lot of trouble with that truck. We live in a very rural area, and she was working the afternoon shift at the cafe in the next town. About 11:30 at night, I was asleep on the couch waiting for her to get home, when all at once she came screaming in through the door all in tears "I hit a deer I hit a deer". Whoa-calm down, babe. Where did you hit it? "On Main Street, just around the corner" Well, is it dead? "I don't think so-it's still under the truck, and it sounds p*ssed right off". WHAT! OK, now I'm the one that needs to calm down. Kim's in the bathroom freaking out. I wake up the 3 year old get him to hold the flash light while I'm trying to get a bead on the deer with my rifle. It was a bad scene. This is just how you end up with a bullet hole in the bottom of your oil pan. I'm just lucky my neighbors had a sense of humor and didn't call the cops when the shooting started. Tasty deer, though!

[GloryHound]

The wife will not be allowed to drive my 69 morphing into a 67. I bought her a nice 98 blazer with less that 50K on the odometer. I got myself a 99 with over 90K on it. Let her drive my truck once and now she steels the thing every chance she gets! I still have to harp on her about her coment "Who would want to drive a big boat like that?"

Maybe they should look at creating a new message board her for the "neglected women of truck junkies"! Kinda like a support group!

[pebbleboy]

Originally Posted by pritch

My wife and I met in a bar. She said she needed a ride home so I said sure, but you gotta drive 'cause I was way to drunk. At the time I had a '67 C-10 W/ three on the tree-one of the good ones that jammed between 1st & 2nd every time you didn't pay strict attention. The whole time she drove, she never missed a shift. I knew then she was a keeper.

But she did have a lot of trouble with that truck. We live in a very rural area, and she was working the afternoon shift at the cafe in the next town. About 11:30 at night, I was asleep on the couch waiting for her to get home, when all at once she came screaming in through the door all in tears "I hit a deer I hit a deer". Whoa-calm down, babe. Where did you hit it? "On Main Street, just around the corner" Well, is it dead? "I don't think so-it's still under the truck, and it sounds p*ssed right off". WHAT! OK, now I'm the one that needs to calm down. Kim's in the bathroom freaking out. I wake up the 3 year old get him to hold the flash light while I'm trying to get a bead on the deer with my rifle. It was a bad scene. This is just how you end up with a bullet hole in the bottom of your oil pan. I'm just lucky my neighbors had a sense of humor and didn't call the cops when the shooting started. Tasty deer, though!

I about chocked on my dinner reading that one. Its usually the way Im told anything.

[Stocker]

Great thread and great stories! Mine's pretty tame.... My wife used to drive mine occasionally but she would sometimes flood it by pumping the gas pedal. Then one day it ran out of gas (gauge is off a bit), but there was plenty in the other tanks (she didn't realize that). She is convinced the truck hates her and refuses to drive it, and that was many years ago.

[Idaho68]

My wife uses my 68 as a daily driver, hmm might that be why the old brute has acquired so many battle scars? Prime example is the time she backed out of the driveway all ticked off, didnt bother using the side mirrors...and caved in the bedside by hitting a dumpster , or the time she backed it right square into my motorcycle that was minding it's own business in it's parking spot . Ahh well, I am working on getting a sweet lil 77 swb stepper, with a 4 speed, thank the powers that be she doesnt drive stick . When the GMC is finally done SHE will be the one repairing it, that oughtta cure some of the insanity

[R@nger]

Originally Posted by pritch

My wife and I met in a bar. She said she needed a ride home so I said sure, but you gotta drive 'cause I was way to drunk. At the time I had a '67 C-10 W/ three on the tree-one of the good ones that jammed between 1st & 2nd every time you didn't pay strict attention. The whole time she drove, she never missed a shift. I knew then she was a keeper.

But she did have a lot of trouble with that truck. We live in a very rural area, and she was working the afternoon shift at the cafe in the next town. About 11:30 at night, I was asleep on the couch waiting for her to get home, when all at once she came screaming in through the door all in tears "I hit a deer I hit a deer". Whoa-calm down, babe. Where did you hit it? "On Main Street, just around the corner" Well, is it dead? "I don't think so-it's still under the truck, and it sounds p*ssed right off". WHAT! OK, now I'm the one that needs to calm down. Kim's in the bathroom freaking out. I wake up the 3 year old get him to hold the flash light while I'm trying to get a bead on the deer with my rifle. It was a bad scene. This is just how you end up with a bullet hole in the bottom of your oil pan. I'm just lucky my neighbors had a sense of humor and didn't call the cops when the shooting started. Tasty deer, though!

LOL how long did she drag it under the truck??

[Terry Peerson]

My '72's doors rattle so much, due to the worn-out hinges, that my wife is convinced that the doors are going to fall off. She will only drive it in an emergency! My new SS is a different story! She would trade me for her Tahoe if I'd let her! She had always driven cars until she surprised me and picked-out a Tahoe. I don't think she will drive a car again. She's a keeper, too. Had her for >27 years.

T

[Lemield]

Originally Posted by R@nger

LOL how long did she drag it under the truck??

Sounds like he didn't need to take the deer to the processor to have burger made! Great story Pritch!

[chickenwing]

Originally Posted by pritch

... Well, is it dead? "I don't think so-it's still under the truck, and it sounds p*ssed right off". ...

LOL! I lost it! Thanks for the story.

[ryanroo]

i don't have any good stories like this thankfully, i am prety protective of my trucks, but i will let about anyone drive them if i think they are trustworthy. the girlfriend has just learned how to drive a manual(the car we just bought is a 5-speed) so i tell her i will teach her, but i will nag her to death until she drives it 100% right. i get a little uncomfortable when she drives them without me, because she is not a very good driver and used to small cars, but she hasn't had any problems so i guess i should calm down. unfortunately she knows barely anything about vehicles, but enjoys the sound my trucks make, so she just makes them be loud i.e. drives them foot to floor. but i do to, so they are used to it.

on the other hand one time i let my stepdad borrow my 88 chevy 3/4 ton. he is a retard when it comes to driving a manual, which i find odd for a farmer. but he takes it for a day and the next morning i go out and it is making the most god awuful howl ive ever heard, so i get to replace a burn clutch and a t/o that was complete toast. worked great the day before when i had it...
Ryan