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01-22-2021, 08:47 AM
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#351 |
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Equal opportunity joke ofender
 
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Eastern Shore of MD
Posts: 10,126
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Re: Joke Thread
...
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Members I have met. Dually Jams, OlBlue60, ScottH, Tommyboy24, Dujobo, Warbucket, 2003 Silverado, Notsolo, my90k5, 6t727t2, Special-K ,Jack_71C10, tabarcus,72blazer_mud_bogger,pwdcougar,RSavage,EricSean,1Rippen6,invicta455,tennaragtop71,arks, Kendal,Bennett68C10, Perpendicular, Chainsawman, McGeesCustomMinis,ShortbedClayton,longblue72,6768chevylover,Tim71,Travisarmenta,Ol' Drippy,fleetmitch,georgieb51,Dave,bcnya2,Dadsburb https://paypal.me/6772GMtruckparts Most women like the strong, silent type… Fortunately for me, my wife prefers the out-of-shape, mouthy type. |
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01-22-2021, 08:59 AM
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#352 | |
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Proprietor of Dale's Corner
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Vacaville , CA
Posts: 16,245
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Re: Joke Thread
Quote:
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"Some Days Chickens And Some Days Feathers" Dale XNGH ECV Sam Brannan 1004 R.I.P. 67ChevyRedneck R.I.P. Grumpy Old Man R.I.P. FleetsidePaul |
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01-22-2021, 07:50 PM
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#353 |
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Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: TN.
Posts: 8,403
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Re: Joke Thread
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________________________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________ 84 Chevy K-20 63 Impala (my high school car) http://67-72chevytrucks.com/vboard/s...Crew Cab Build |
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01-22-2021, 08:11 PM
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#354 |
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Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: TN.
Posts: 8,403
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Re: Joke Thread
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________________________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________ 84 Chevy K-20 63 Impala (my high school car) http://67-72chevytrucks.com/vboard/s...Crew Cab Build |
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01-23-2021, 10:05 AM
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#355 |
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Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: TN.
Posts: 8,403
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Re: Joke Thread
Pharmacists
A nice, calm and respectable lady went into the pharmacy, walked up to the pharmacist, looked straight into his eyes, and said, 'I would like to buy some cyanide.' The pharmacist asked, 'Why in the world do you need cyanide?' The lady replied, 'I need it to poison my husband.' The pharmacist's eyes got big and he exclaimed, 'Lord have mercy! I can't give you cyanide to kill your husband. That's against the law! I'll lose my license! They'll throw both of us in jail! All kinds of bad things will happen. Absolutely not! You CANNOT have any cyanide!' The lady reached into her purse and pulled out a picture of her husband in bed with the pharmacist's wife. The pharmacist looked at the picture and replied, 'Well now, that's different. You didn't tell me you had a prescription. .
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________________________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________ 84 Chevy K-20 63 Impala (my high school car) http://67-72chevytrucks.com/vboard/s...Crew Cab Build |
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01-23-2021, 10:21 AM
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#356 |
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Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: TN.
Posts: 8,403
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Re: Joke Thread
Attention!!!!!!!!
Virus Warning!!!!!!! The Center for Disease Control has issued a medical alert about a highly contagious, potentially dangerous virus that is transmitted orally, by hand, and even electronically. This virus is called Weekly Overload Recreational Killer (WORK). If you receive WORK from your boss, any of your colleagues or anyone else via any means whatsoever - DO NOT TOUCH IT!!! This virus will wipe out your private life entirely. If you should come into contact with WORK you should immediately leave the premises. Take two good friends to the nearest liquor store and purchase one or both of the antidotes - Work Isolating Neutralizer Extract (WINE) and Bothersome Employer Elimination Rebooter (BEER). Take the antidote repeatedly until WORK has been completely eliminated from your system. You should immediately forward this medical alert to five friends. If you do not have five friends, you have already been infected and WORK is controlling your life. .
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________________________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________ 84 Chevy K-20 63 Impala (my high school car) http://67-72chevytrucks.com/vboard/s...Crew Cab Build |
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01-23-2021, 12:52 PM
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#357 |
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laying low
Join Date: Mar 2001
Location: Searcy, Ark. USA
Posts: 13,513
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Re: Joke Thread
Oh man. I've had that. It did me in.
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Boog 69 Chevy stepside, 358/T350, 4.11 posi, 4.5/4 drop, rallys, poboy driver primer is finer 91 Chevy sportside, Tahoe, Yukon & GMC Crewcab All GM..'nuff said. I stand for the flag and kneel at the cross |
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01-23-2021, 02:26 PM
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#358 |
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Equal opportunity joke ofender
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Eastern Shore of MD
Posts: 10,126
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Re: Joke Thread
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__________________
Members I have met. Dually Jams, OlBlue60, ScottH, Tommyboy24, Dujobo, Warbucket, 2003 Silverado, Notsolo, my90k5, 6t727t2, Special-K ,Jack_71C10, tabarcus,72blazer_mud_bogger,pwdcougar,RSavage,EricSean,1Rippen6,invicta455,tennaragtop71,arks, Kendal,Bennett68C10, Perpendicular, Chainsawman, McGeesCustomMinis,ShortbedClayton,longblue72,6768chevylover,Tim71,Travisarmenta,Ol' Drippy,fleetmitch,georgieb51,Dave,bcnya2,Dadsburb https://paypal.me/6772GMtruckparts Most women like the strong, silent type… Fortunately for me, my wife prefers the out-of-shape, mouthy type. |
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01-23-2021, 03:18 PM
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#359 | |
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2001
Location: Orem, Utah
Posts: 7,976
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Re: Joke Thread
Quote:
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I have sworn upon the altar of God, eternal hostility against every form of tyranny over the mind of man. - Thomas Jefferson |
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01-23-2021, 03:50 PM
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#360 |
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Registered User
Join Date: May 2015
Location: Montana
Posts: 3,696
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Re: Joke Thread
Just found this on Gab:
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Current/past Chevy/GMC trucks: 1958 Chevy C-60; 1965 GMC C-50; 1965 Chevy C-10; 1971 Chevy K-10; 1973 Chevy K-20; 1976 GMC C-20; 1977 Chevy C-10 Suburban; 1980 Chevy K-10; 1989 Chevy K1500; 1991 GMC V1500 Suburban; 2016 Chevy K2500 HD Other vehicles: 1988 Jeep XJ; 2011 Toyota 4Runner |
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01-23-2021, 04:22 PM
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#361 |
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R.I.P. E.S.L.L.
 
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Kernville CA./ Lake Isabella CA.
Posts: 11,418
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Re: Joke Thread
 
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1971 Custom C/20  1970 CST 20 1970 C/30 Flatbed 1983 C/30 Dually 2015 Corvette Z51 2021 Corvette Z51 1991 Cadillac Hearse 1982 Cadillac Eldorado Biarritz 2000 Porsche Boxster S 2020 Jeep Gladiator 1973 VW Thing 1973 Plymouth Satellite wagon 1963 Baja Bug 1959 Bug Dune Buggy 1970 Baja Bug 1987 Jaguar XJ 350. R.I.P. El Jay R.I.P Jessie. R.I.P Grumpy. Every day is a gift from God. |
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01-24-2021, 10:31 AM
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#362 |
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Equal opportunity joke ofender
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Eastern Shore of MD
Posts: 10,126
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Re: Joke Thread
For all the people queuing for McDonalds.
I was at the McDonald’s drive-through this morning and a young lady behind me leaned on her horn and started mouthing something because I was taking too long to place my order. So when I got to the first window I paid for her order along with my own. The McDonalds worker must have told her what I'd done, As soon as i moved up she leaned out her window and waved to me and mouthed.... "Thank you." obviously embarrassed that I had repaid her rudeness with kindness. When I got to the second window I showed them both receipts and took her food too. Now she has to go back to the end of the queue and start all over again, DON'T blow your horn and get rude! Be patient
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Members I have met. Dually Jams, OlBlue60, ScottH, Tommyboy24, Dujobo, Warbucket, 2003 Silverado, Notsolo, my90k5, 6t727t2, Special-K ,Jack_71C10, tabarcus,72blazer_mud_bogger,pwdcougar,RSavage,EricSean,1Rippen6,invicta455,tennaragtop71,arks, Kendal,Bennett68C10, Perpendicular, Chainsawman, McGeesCustomMinis,ShortbedClayton,longblue72,6768chevylover,Tim71,Travisarmenta,Ol' Drippy,fleetmitch,georgieb51,Dave,bcnya2,Dadsburb https://paypal.me/6772GMtruckparts Most women like the strong, silent type… Fortunately for me, my wife prefers the out-of-shape, mouthy type. |
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01-24-2021, 11:55 AM
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#363 |
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Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: TN.
Posts: 8,403
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Re: Joke Thread
Bad Bus Driver (Bad)
 A woman got on a bus holding a baby. The bus driver said: "That's the ugliest baby i've ever seen." In a huff, the woman slammed her fare into the fare box and took an aisle seat near the rear of the bus. The man seated next to her sensed that she was agitated and asked her what was wrong. "The bus driver insulted me," she fumed. The man sympathized and said: "Why, he's a public servant and shouldn't say things to insult passengers." "You're right," she said. " I think i'll go back up there an give him a piece of my mind." "Thats a good idea," the man said. "Here, let me hold your monkey." .
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________________________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________ 84 Chevy K-20 63 Impala (my high school car) http://67-72chevytrucks.com/vboard/s...Crew Cab Build |
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01-24-2021, 12:01 PM
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#364 |
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Equal opportunity joke ofender
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Eastern Shore of MD
Posts: 10,126
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Re: Joke Thread
...
__________________
Members I have met. Dually Jams, OlBlue60, ScottH, Tommyboy24, Dujobo, Warbucket, 2003 Silverado, Notsolo, my90k5, 6t727t2, Special-K ,Jack_71C10, tabarcus,72blazer_mud_bogger,pwdcougar,RSavage,EricSean,1Rippen6,invicta455,tennaragtop71,arks, Kendal,Bennett68C10, Perpendicular, Chainsawman, McGeesCustomMinis,ShortbedClayton,longblue72,6768chevylover,Tim71,Travisarmenta,Ol' Drippy,fleetmitch,georgieb51,Dave,bcnya2,Dadsburb https://paypal.me/6772GMtruckparts Most women like the strong, silent type… Fortunately for me, my wife prefers the out-of-shape, mouthy type. |
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01-26-2021, 09:01 AM
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#365 |
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Equal opportunity joke ofender
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Eastern Shore of MD
Posts: 10,126
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Re: Joke Thread
A guy walked into the local welfare office to pick up his check. He marched straight up to the counter and said,"Hi. You know...., I just HATE drawing welfare. I'd really rather have a job." The social worker behind the counter said, "Your timing is excellent. We just got a job opening from a very wealthy old man who wants a Chauffeur and bodyguard for his beautiful daughter. You'll drive his 2021... Mercedes-Benz CL and he will supply all of your clothes.Because of the long hours, meals will be provided. You'll also be expected to escort the daughter on her overseas holiday trips. This is rather awkward to say, but you will also as part of your job description have to satisfy her sexual urges. The daughter is in her mid-20's and has a rather strong sex drive." The guy in wide-eyed amazement said, "You're bull****tin' me!" The social worker said: "Yeah, well ... You started it
__________________
Members I have met. Dually Jams, OlBlue60, ScottH, Tommyboy24, Dujobo, Warbucket, 2003 Silverado, Notsolo, my90k5, 6t727t2, Special-K ,Jack_71C10, tabarcus,72blazer_mud_bogger,pwdcougar,RSavage,EricSean,1Rippen6,invicta455,tennaragtop71,arks, Kendal,Bennett68C10, Perpendicular, Chainsawman, McGeesCustomMinis,ShortbedClayton,longblue72,6768chevylover,Tim71,Travisarmenta,Ol' Drippy,fleetmitch,georgieb51,Dave,bcnya2,Dadsburb https://paypal.me/6772GMtruckparts Most women like the strong, silent type… Fortunately for me, my wife prefers the out-of-shape, mouthy type. |
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01-26-2021, 03:12 PM
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#366 |
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Equal opportunity joke ofender
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Eastern Shore of MD
Posts: 10,126
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Re: Joke Thread
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__________________
Members I have met. Dually Jams, OlBlue60, ScottH, Tommyboy24, Dujobo, Warbucket, 2003 Silverado, Notsolo, my90k5, 6t727t2, Special-K ,Jack_71C10, tabarcus,72blazer_mud_bogger,pwdcougar,RSavage,EricSean,1Rippen6,invicta455,tennaragtop71,arks, Kendal,Bennett68C10, Perpendicular, Chainsawman, McGeesCustomMinis,ShortbedClayton,longblue72,6768chevylover,Tim71,Travisarmenta,Ol' Drippy,fleetmitch,georgieb51,Dave,bcnya2,Dadsburb https://paypal.me/6772GMtruckparts Most women like the strong, silent type… Fortunately for me, my wife prefers the out-of-shape, mouthy type. |
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01-27-2021, 09:00 AM
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#367 |
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Equal opportunity joke ofender
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Eastern Shore of MD
Posts: 10,126
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Re: Joke Thread
Yesterday, I had a flat tire on the interstate. So I eased my car over to the shoulder of the road, carefully got out of the car and opened the trunk.
I took out two cardboard men, unfolded them and stood them at the rear of my car facing on-coming traffic. They looked so life like you wouldn’t believe it! They’re dressed in open trench coats that exposed their nude bodies and private parts to the approaching drivers. But to my surprise, cars started slowing down to look at my lifelike men. And, of course, traffic began backing up. Everybody tooted their horns and waved like crazy. It wasn’t long before a state trooper pulled up behind me. He got out of his car and walked towards me. I could tell he was not a happy camper! “What’s going on here?” “My car has a flat tire,” I said calmly. “Well, what the hell are those obscene cardboard men doing here by the road?” I couldn’t believe that he didn’t know. So I told him, “Helloooooo, those are my emergency flashers!”
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Members I have met. Dually Jams, OlBlue60, ScottH, Tommyboy24, Dujobo, Warbucket, 2003 Silverado, Notsolo, my90k5, 6t727t2, Special-K ,Jack_71C10, tabarcus,72blazer_mud_bogger,pwdcougar,RSavage,EricSean,1Rippen6,invicta455,tennaragtop71,arks, Kendal,Bennett68C10, Perpendicular, Chainsawman, McGeesCustomMinis,ShortbedClayton,longblue72,6768chevylover,Tim71,Travisarmenta,Ol' Drippy,fleetmitch,georgieb51,Dave,bcnya2,Dadsburb https://paypal.me/6772GMtruckparts Most women like the strong, silent type… Fortunately for me, my wife prefers the out-of-shape, mouthy type. |
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01-27-2021, 11:06 AM
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#368 |
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Registered User
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: Springfield, MO
Posts: 2,939
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Re: Joke Thread
oh Richard you got me on that one! Didn't see it coming.
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Dave 1968 Custom Chevy with turbo charged 5.3 gen III 4l80e swap 1967-71 GMC 3/4 ton long step 4x4 (not sure what year exactly?) "A good friend will bail you out of jail...but a true friend will be sitting next to you saying "that was frekin awesome". "If it doesn't fit force it...If it breaks then it needed to be replaced anyway!" |
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01-27-2021, 11:08 AM
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#369 | |
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Proprietor of Dale's Corner
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Vacaville , CA
Posts: 16,245
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Re: Joke Thread
Quote:
__________________
"Some Days Chickens And Some Days Feathers" Dale XNGH ECV Sam Brannan 1004 R.I.P. 67ChevyRedneck R.I.P. Grumpy Old Man R.I.P. FleetsidePaul |
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01-27-2021, 11:31 AM
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#370 |
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State of Confusion!
 
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: Gulfport, MS USA
Posts: 47,216
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Re: Joke Thread
x3
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Bill 1970 Chevy Custom/10 LWB Fleetside 2010 Toyota Tacoma PreRunner SR5 Double Cab - DD Member of Louisiana Classic Truck Club (LCTC) Bill's Gallery Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift. Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God! |
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01-29-2021, 08:18 AM
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#371 |
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Equal opportunity joke ofender
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Eastern Shore of MD
Posts: 10,126
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Re: Joke Thread
4 more payments and this baby is finally mine
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__________________
Members I have met. Dually Jams, OlBlue60, ScottH, Tommyboy24, Dujobo, Warbucket, 2003 Silverado, Notsolo, my90k5, 6t727t2, Special-K ,Jack_71C10, tabarcus,72blazer_mud_bogger,pwdcougar,RSavage,EricSean,1Rippen6,invicta455,tennaragtop71,arks, Kendal,Bennett68C10, Perpendicular, Chainsawman, McGeesCustomMinis,ShortbedClayton,longblue72,6768chevylover,Tim71,Travisarmenta,Ol' Drippy,fleetmitch,georgieb51,Dave,bcnya2,Dadsburb https://paypal.me/6772GMtruckparts Most women like the strong, silent type… Fortunately for me, my wife prefers the out-of-shape, mouthy type. |
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01-29-2021, 10:30 AM
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#372 | |
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Proprietor of Dale's Corner
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Vacaville , CA
Posts: 16,245
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Re: Joke Thread
Quote:
__________________
"Some Days Chickens And Some Days Feathers" Dale XNGH ECV Sam Brannan 1004 R.I.P. 67ChevyRedneck R.I.P. Grumpy Old Man R.I.P. FleetsidePaul |
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01-29-2021, 12:15 PM
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#373 | |
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R.I.P. E.S.L.L.
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Kernville CA./ Lake Isabella CA.
Posts: 11,418
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Re: Joke Thread
Quote:
__________________
1971 Custom C/20 1970 CST 20 1970 C/30 Flatbed 1983 C/30 Dually 2015 Corvette Z51 2021 Corvette Z51 1991 Cadillac Hearse 1982 Cadillac Eldorado Biarritz 2000 Porsche Boxster S 2020 Jeep Gladiator 1973 VW Thing 1973 Plymouth Satellite wagon 1963 Baja Bug 1959 Bug Dune Buggy 1970 Baja Bug 1987 Jaguar XJ 350. R.I.P. El Jay R.I.P Jessie. R.I.P Grumpy. Every day is a gift from God. |
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01-30-2021, 01:28 PM
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#374 |
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laying low
Join Date: Mar 2001
Location: Searcy, Ark. USA
Posts: 13,513
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Re: Joke Thread
"I am responsible for what I say, not for what you understand."
A seminar on time travel will be held here 2 weeks ago! If a man speaks in the forest and no woman hears him, is he still wrong? I danced like no one was watching. My court date is pending.. Bigfoot saw me and no one believes him either..
__________________
Boog 69 Chevy stepside, 358/T350, 4.11 posi, 4.5/4 drop, rallys, poboy driver primer is finer 91 Chevy sportside, Tahoe, Yukon & GMC Crewcab All GM..'nuff said. I stand for the flag and kneel at the cross |
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01-30-2021, 02:53 PM
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#375 |
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Registered User
Join Date: May 2015
Location: Montana
Posts: 3,696
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Re: Joke Thread
Why do mermaids wear seashells on their breasts?
Because B-shells are too small and D-shells are too big!
__________________
Current/past Chevy/GMC trucks: 1958 Chevy C-60; 1965 GMC C-50; 1965 Chevy C-10; 1971 Chevy K-10; 1973 Chevy K-20; 1976 GMC C-20; 1977 Chevy C-10 Suburban; 1980 Chevy K-10; 1989 Chevy K1500; 1991 GMC V1500 Suburban; 2016 Chevy K2500 HD Other vehicles: 1988 Jeep XJ; 2011 Toyota 4Runner |
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