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#1 |
Equal opportunity joke ofender
![]() Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Eastern Shore of MD
Posts: 10,011
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Re: Joke Thread
...
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Members I have met. Dually Jams, OlBlue60, ScottH, Tommyboy24, Dujobo, Warbucket, 2003 Silverado, Notsolo, my90k5, 6t727t2, Special-K ,Jack_71C10, tabarcus,72blazer_mud_bogger,pwdcougar,RSavage,EricSean,1Rippen6,invicta455,tennaragtop71,arks, Kendal,Bennett68C10, Perpendicular, Chainsawman, McGeesCustomMinis,ShortbedClayton,longblue72,6768chevylover,Tim71,Travisarmenta,Ol' Drippy,fleetmitch,georgieb51,Dave,bcnya2,Dadsburb https://paypal.me/6772GMtruckparts Most women like the strong, silent type… Fortunately for me, my wife prefers the out-of-shape, mouthy type. |
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#2 |
Senior Member
![]() Join Date: Jan 2001
Location: Orem, Utah
Posts: 7,901
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Re: Joke Thread
__________________
I have sworn upon the altar of God, eternal hostility against every form of tyranny over the mind of man. - Thomas Jefferson |
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#3 |
Registered User
Join Date: May 2015
Location: Montana
Posts: 3,696
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Re: Joke Thread
Just found this on Gab:
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Current/past Chevy/GMC trucks: 1958 Chevy C-60; 1965 GMC C-50; 1965 Chevy C-10; 1971 Chevy K-10; 1973 Chevy K-20; 1976 GMC C-20; 1977 Chevy C-10 Suburban; 1980 Chevy K-10; 1989 Chevy K1500; 1991 GMC V1500 Suburban; 2016 Chevy K2500 HD Other vehicles: 1988 Jeep XJ; 2011 Toyota 4Runner |
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#4 |
R.I.P. E.S.L.L.
![]() ![]() Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Kernville CA./ Lake Isabella CA.
Posts: 11,419
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Re: Joke Thread
__________________
1971 Custom C/20 ![]() 1970 CST 20 1970 C/30 Flatbed 1983 C/30 Dually 2015 Corvette Z51 2021 Corvette Z51 1991 Cadillac Hearse 1982 Cadillac Eldorado Biarritz 2000 Porsche Boxster S 2020 Jeep Gladiator 1973 VW Thing 1973 Plymouth Satellite wagon 1963 Baja Bug 1959 Bug Dune Buggy 1970 Baja Bug 1987 Jaguar XJ 350. R.I.P. El Jay R.I.P Jessie. R.I.P Grumpy. Every day is a gift from God. |
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#5 |
Equal opportunity joke ofender
![]() Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Eastern Shore of MD
Posts: 10,011
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Re: Joke Thread
For all the people queuing for McDonalds.
I was at the McDonald’s drive-through this morning and a young lady behind me leaned on her horn and started mouthing something because I was taking too long to place my order. So when I got to the first window I paid for her order along with my own. The McDonalds worker must have told her what I'd done, As soon as i moved up she leaned out her window and waved to me and mouthed.... "Thank you." obviously embarrassed that I had repaid her rudeness with kindness. When I got to the second window I showed them both receipts and took her food too. Now she has to go back to the end of the queue and start all over again, DON'T blow your horn and get rude! Be patient
__________________
Members I have met. Dually Jams, OlBlue60, ScottH, Tommyboy24, Dujobo, Warbucket, 2003 Silverado, Notsolo, my90k5, 6t727t2, Special-K ,Jack_71C10, tabarcus,72blazer_mud_bogger,pwdcougar,RSavage,EricSean,1Rippen6,invicta455,tennaragtop71,arks, Kendal,Bennett68C10, Perpendicular, Chainsawman, McGeesCustomMinis,ShortbedClayton,longblue72,6768chevylover,Tim71,Travisarmenta,Ol' Drippy,fleetmitch,georgieb51,Dave,bcnya2,Dadsburb https://paypal.me/6772GMtruckparts Most women like the strong, silent type… Fortunately for me, my wife prefers the out-of-shape, mouthy type. |
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#6 |
Senior Member
![]() Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: TN.
Posts: 8,073
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Re: Joke Thread
Bad Bus Driver (Bad)
![]() A woman got on a bus holding a baby. The bus driver said: "That's the ugliest baby i've ever seen." In a huff, the woman slammed her fare into the fare box and took an aisle seat near the rear of the bus. The man seated next to her sensed that she was agitated and asked her what was wrong. "The bus driver insulted me," she fumed. The man sympathized and said: "Why, he's a public servant and shouldn't say things to insult passengers." "You're right," she said. " I think i'll go back up there an give him a piece of my mind." "Thats a good idea," the man said. "Here, let me hold your monkey." .
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________________________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________ 84 Chevy K-20 63 Impala (my high school car) http://67-72chevytrucks.com/vboard/s...Crew Cab Build |
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#7 |
Equal opportunity joke ofender
![]() Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Eastern Shore of MD
Posts: 10,011
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Re: Joke Thread
...
__________________
Members I have met. Dually Jams, OlBlue60, ScottH, Tommyboy24, Dujobo, Warbucket, 2003 Silverado, Notsolo, my90k5, 6t727t2, Special-K ,Jack_71C10, tabarcus,72blazer_mud_bogger,pwdcougar,RSavage,EricSean,1Rippen6,invicta455,tennaragtop71,arks, Kendal,Bennett68C10, Perpendicular, Chainsawman, McGeesCustomMinis,ShortbedClayton,longblue72,6768chevylover,Tim71,Travisarmenta,Ol' Drippy,fleetmitch,georgieb51,Dave,bcnya2,Dadsburb https://paypal.me/6772GMtruckparts Most women like the strong, silent type… Fortunately for me, my wife prefers the out-of-shape, mouthy type. |
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#8 |
Equal opportunity joke ofender
![]() Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Eastern Shore of MD
Posts: 10,011
|
Re: Joke Thread
A guy walked into the local welfare office to pick up his check. He marched straight up to the counter and said,"Hi. You know...., I just HATE drawing welfare. I'd really rather have a job." The social worker behind the counter said, "Your timing is excellent. We just got a job opening from a very wealthy old man who wants a Chauffeur and bodyguard for his beautiful daughter. You'll drive his 2021... Mercedes-Benz CL and he will supply all of your clothes.Because of the long hours, meals will be provided. You'll also be expected to escort the daughter on her overseas holiday trips. This is rather awkward to say, but you will also as part of your job description have to satisfy her sexual urges. The daughter is in her mid-20's and has a rather strong sex drive." The guy in wide-eyed amazement said, "You're bull****tin' me!" The social worker said: "Yeah, well ... You started it
__________________
Members I have met. Dually Jams, OlBlue60, ScottH, Tommyboy24, Dujobo, Warbucket, 2003 Silverado, Notsolo, my90k5, 6t727t2, Special-K ,Jack_71C10, tabarcus,72blazer_mud_bogger,pwdcougar,RSavage,EricSean,1Rippen6,invicta455,tennaragtop71,arks, Kendal,Bennett68C10, Perpendicular, Chainsawman, McGeesCustomMinis,ShortbedClayton,longblue72,6768chevylover,Tim71,Travisarmenta,Ol' Drippy,fleetmitch,georgieb51,Dave,bcnya2,Dadsburb https://paypal.me/6772GMtruckparts Most women like the strong, silent type… Fortunately for me, my wife prefers the out-of-shape, mouthy type. |
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#9 |
Equal opportunity joke ofender
![]() Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Eastern Shore of MD
Posts: 10,011
|
Re: Joke Thread
...
__________________
Members I have met. Dually Jams, OlBlue60, ScottH, Tommyboy24, Dujobo, Warbucket, 2003 Silverado, Notsolo, my90k5, 6t727t2, Special-K ,Jack_71C10, tabarcus,72blazer_mud_bogger,pwdcougar,RSavage,EricSean,1Rippen6,invicta455,tennaragtop71,arks, Kendal,Bennett68C10, Perpendicular, Chainsawman, McGeesCustomMinis,ShortbedClayton,longblue72,6768chevylover,Tim71,Travisarmenta,Ol' Drippy,fleetmitch,georgieb51,Dave,bcnya2,Dadsburb https://paypal.me/6772GMtruckparts Most women like the strong, silent type… Fortunately for me, my wife prefers the out-of-shape, mouthy type. |
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#10 |
Equal opportunity joke ofender
![]() Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Eastern Shore of MD
Posts: 10,011
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Re: Joke Thread
Yesterday, I had a flat tire on the interstate. So I eased my car over to the shoulder of the road, carefully got out of the car and opened the trunk.
I took out two cardboard men, unfolded them and stood them at the rear of my car facing on-coming traffic. They looked so life like you wouldn’t believe it! They’re dressed in open trench coats that exposed their nude bodies and private parts to the approaching drivers. But to my surprise, cars started slowing down to look at my lifelike men. And, of course, traffic began backing up. Everybody tooted their horns and waved like crazy. It wasn’t long before a state trooper pulled up behind me. He got out of his car and walked towards me. I could tell he was not a happy camper! “What’s going on here?” “My car has a flat tire,” I said calmly. “Well, what the hell are those obscene cardboard men doing here by the road?” I couldn’t believe that he didn’t know. So I told him, “Helloooooo, those are my emergency flashers!”
__________________
Members I have met. Dually Jams, OlBlue60, ScottH, Tommyboy24, Dujobo, Warbucket, 2003 Silverado, Notsolo, my90k5, 6t727t2, Special-K ,Jack_71C10, tabarcus,72blazer_mud_bogger,pwdcougar,RSavage,EricSean,1Rippen6,invicta455,tennaragtop71,arks, Kendal,Bennett68C10, Perpendicular, Chainsawman, McGeesCustomMinis,ShortbedClayton,longblue72,6768chevylover,Tim71,Travisarmenta,Ol' Drippy,fleetmitch,georgieb51,Dave,bcnya2,Dadsburb https://paypal.me/6772GMtruckparts Most women like the strong, silent type… Fortunately for me, my wife prefers the out-of-shape, mouthy type. |
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#11 |
Registered User
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: Springfield, MO
Posts: 2,932
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Re: Joke Thread
oh Richard you got me on that one! Didn't see it coming.
__________________
Dave 1968 Custom Chevy with turbo charged 5.3 gen III 4l80e swap 1967-71 GMC 3/4 ton long step 4x4 (not sure what year exactly?) "A good friend will bail you out of jail...but a true friend will be sitting next to you saying "that was frekin awesome". "If it doesn't fit force it...If it breaks then it needed to be replaced anyway!" |
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#12 |
Proprietor of Dale's Corner
![]() Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Vacaville , CA
Posts: 16,087
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Re: Joke Thread
Me either.
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"Some Days Chickens And Some Days Feathers" Dale XNGH ECV Sam Brannan 1004 R.I.P. 67ChevyRedneck R.I.P. Grumpy Old Man |
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#13 |
State of Confusion!
![]() ![]() Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: Gulfport, MS USA
Posts: 46,863
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Re: Joke Thread
x3
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Bill 1970 Chevy Custom/10 LWB Fleetside 2010 Toyota Tacoma PreRunner SR5 Double Cab - DD Member of Louisiana Classic Truck Club (LCTC) Bill's Gallery Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift. Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. Leave the rest to God! |
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#14 |
Equal opportunity joke ofender
![]() Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Eastern Shore of MD
Posts: 10,011
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Re: Joke Thread
4 more payments and this baby is finally mine
.
__________________
Members I have met. Dually Jams, OlBlue60, ScottH, Tommyboy24, Dujobo, Warbucket, 2003 Silverado, Notsolo, my90k5, 6t727t2, Special-K ,Jack_71C10, tabarcus,72blazer_mud_bogger,pwdcougar,RSavage,EricSean,1Rippen6,invicta455,tennaragtop71,arks, Kendal,Bennett68C10, Perpendicular, Chainsawman, McGeesCustomMinis,ShortbedClayton,longblue72,6768chevylover,Tim71,Travisarmenta,Ol' Drippy,fleetmitch,georgieb51,Dave,bcnya2,Dadsburb https://paypal.me/6772GMtruckparts Most women like the strong, silent type… Fortunately for me, my wife prefers the out-of-shape, mouthy type. |
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#15 |
Proprietor of Dale's Corner
![]() Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Vacaville , CA
Posts: 16,087
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Re: Joke Thread
There's a lot of truth in that one.....
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__________________
"Some Days Chickens And Some Days Feathers" Dale XNGH ECV Sam Brannan 1004 R.I.P. 67ChevyRedneck R.I.P. Grumpy Old Man |
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#16 |
R.I.P. E.S.L.L.
![]() ![]() Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Kernville CA./ Lake Isabella CA.
Posts: 11,419
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Re: Joke Thread
__________________
1971 Custom C/20 ![]() 1970 CST 20 1970 C/30 Flatbed 1983 C/30 Dually 2015 Corvette Z51 2021 Corvette Z51 1991 Cadillac Hearse 1982 Cadillac Eldorado Biarritz 2000 Porsche Boxster S 2020 Jeep Gladiator 1973 VW Thing 1973 Plymouth Satellite wagon 1963 Baja Bug 1959 Bug Dune Buggy 1970 Baja Bug 1987 Jaguar XJ 350. R.I.P. El Jay R.I.P Jessie. R.I.P Grumpy. Every day is a gift from God. |
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#17 |
laying low
![]() Join Date: Mar 2001
Location: Searcy, Ark. USA
Posts: 13,214
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Re: Joke Thread
"I am responsible for what I say, not for what you understand."
A seminar on time travel will be held here 2 weeks ago! If a man speaks in the forest and no woman hears him, is he still wrong? I danced like no one was watching. My court date is pending.. Bigfoot saw me and no one believes him either.. ![]()
__________________
Boog 69 Chevy stepside, 358/T350, 4.11 posi, 4.5/4 drop, rallys, poboy driver primer is finer 91 Chevy sportside, Tahoe, Yukon & GMC Crewcab All GM..'nuff said. I stand for the flag and kneel at the cross |
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#18 |
Registered User
Join Date: May 2015
Location: Montana
Posts: 3,696
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Re: Joke Thread
Why do mermaids wear seashells on their breasts?
Because B-shells are too small and D-shells are too big!
__________________
Current/past Chevy/GMC trucks: 1958 Chevy C-60; 1965 GMC C-50; 1965 Chevy C-10; 1971 Chevy K-10; 1973 Chevy K-20; 1976 GMC C-20; 1977 Chevy C-10 Suburban; 1980 Chevy K-10; 1989 Chevy K1500; 1991 GMC V1500 Suburban; 2016 Chevy K2500 HD Other vehicles: 1988 Jeep XJ; 2011 Toyota 4Runner |
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#19 |
Equal opportunity joke ofender
![]() Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Eastern Shore of MD
Posts: 10,011
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Re: Joke Thread
Four men are in the hospital waiting room because their wives are having babies. A nurse goes up to the first guy and says, “Congratulations! You’re the father of twins.”
“That’s odd,” answers the man. “I work for the Minnesota Twins!” A nurse says to the second guy, “Congratulations! You’re the father of triplets!” “That’s weird,” answers the second man. “I work for the 3M company!” A nurse tells the third man, “Congratulations! You’re the father of quadruplets!” “That’s strange,” he answers. “I work for the Four Seasons hotel!” The last man is groaning and banging his head against the wall. “What’s wrong?” the others ask. “I work for 7 Up!”
__________________
Members I have met. Dually Jams, OlBlue60, ScottH, Tommyboy24, Dujobo, Warbucket, 2003 Silverado, Notsolo, my90k5, 6t727t2, Special-K ,Jack_71C10, tabarcus,72blazer_mud_bogger,pwdcougar,RSavage,EricSean,1Rippen6,invicta455,tennaragtop71,arks, Kendal,Bennett68C10, Perpendicular, Chainsawman, McGeesCustomMinis,ShortbedClayton,longblue72,6768chevylover,Tim71,Travisarmenta,Ol' Drippy,fleetmitch,georgieb51,Dave,bcnya2,Dadsburb https://paypal.me/6772GMtruckparts Most women like the strong, silent type… Fortunately for me, my wife prefers the out-of-shape, mouthy type. |
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#20 |
Senior Member
![]() Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: TN.
Posts: 8,073
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Re: Joke Thread
Remember to respect your elders!
A 71-year-old man made the trip back to his old college to take one last look around campus again before he settled in to retired life. As he got to the campus he saw a young man studying hard, and the sight brought back memories. He sat on the bench beside the lad, but was surprised when the kid started spouting off at him. “You old man. Your generation will never understand my generation,” the kid lectured. “You grew up in a different world. In fact, your world is almost primitive compared to mine,” the student said. “Is that right?” the elder man said. “The young people of today grew up with television, jet planes, space travel, microwaves. I can carry hundreds of books on a tiny chip in my cell phone. We have nuclear energy, electric and hydrogen cars, computers with light-speed processing, and,” he paused to take swig of beer. The senior took advantage of the break in the student’s litany and said, “You’re right, son. We didn’t have those things when we were young – so we invented them. Now, you arrogant little bastard, what are you doing for the next generation?” The student fell completely silent and all the people around them cheered! .
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________________________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________ 84 Chevy K-20 63 Impala (my high school car) http://67-72chevytrucks.com/vboard/s...Crew Cab Build |
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#21 | |
Proprietor of Dale's Corner
![]() Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Vacaville , CA
Posts: 16,087
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Re: Joke Thread
Quote:
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"Some Days Chickens And Some Days Feathers" Dale XNGH ECV Sam Brannan 1004 R.I.P. 67ChevyRedneck R.I.P. Grumpy Old Man |
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#22 |
Registered User
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: DALLAS,TX
Posts: 21,964
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Re: Joke Thread
__________________
67SWB-B.B.RetroRod 64SWB-Recycle 89CCDually-Driver/Tow Truck 99CCSWB Driver All Fleetsides @rattlecankustoms in IG Building a small, high rpm engine with the perfect bore, stroke and rod ratio is very impressive. It's like a highly skilled Morrocan sword fighter with a Damascus Steel Scimitar..... Cubic inches is like Indiana Jones with a cheap pistol. |
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#23 |
Senior Member
![]() Join Date: Jan 2001
Location: Orem, Utah
Posts: 7,901
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Re: Joke Thread
My daughter shared this with me yesterday.
__________________
I have sworn upon the altar of God, eternal hostility against every form of tyranny over the mind of man. - Thomas Jefferson |
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#24 |
The Older Generation
![]() ![]() ![]() Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Montezuma, Iowa
Posts: 25,480
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Re: Joke Thread
-
The last straw....
__________________
Leon Locksmith, Specializing In Antique Trucks, Automobiles, & Motorcycles (My Dually Pickup Project Thread) http://67-72chevytrucks.com/vboard/s...d.php?t=829820 - |
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#25 |
Equal opportunity joke ofender
![]() Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Eastern Shore of MD
Posts: 10,011
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Re: Joke Thread
Dang Leon don't scare me like that. Got this email notification and 1st thought was somebody posted something wrong and you were closing the thread
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__________________
Members I have met. Dually Jams, OlBlue60, ScottH, Tommyboy24, Dujobo, Warbucket, 2003 Silverado, Notsolo, my90k5, 6t727t2, Special-K ,Jack_71C10, tabarcus,72blazer_mud_bogger,pwdcougar,RSavage,EricSean,1Rippen6,invicta455,tennaragtop71,arks, Kendal,Bennett68C10, Perpendicular, Chainsawman, McGeesCustomMinis,ShortbedClayton,longblue72,6768chevylover,Tim71,Travisarmenta,Ol' Drippy,fleetmitch,georgieb51,Dave,bcnya2,Dadsburb https://paypal.me/6772GMtruckparts Most women like the strong, silent type… Fortunately for me, my wife prefers the out-of-shape, mouthy type. |
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