Joke Thread - Page 35 - The 1947 - Present Chevrolet & GMC Truck Message Board Network

**richard2717** · 08-01-2021, 09:11 AM

see

**richard2717** · 08-01-2021, 09:11 AM

stole

**Getter-Done** · 08-01-2021, 09:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by richard2717

see

Your are the

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.

**richard2717** · 08-01-2021, 11:42 AM

miss

**Steeveedee** · 08-02-2021, 12:43 PM

This is horrible, but I still laughed-

Judge: How could you kill 24 people? What is wrong with you?

Driver: I was driving at 50mph when I saw two men crossing the road. On the roadside, there was a restaurant with outside seating. I wanted to apply the brakes, but I realized they were not working. So I had to take a decision: Either hit the 2 men or run into the restaurant.

Judge: Hit the 2 men of course!

Driver: Exactly! After hitting the first man, the other man ran inside the restaurant so l followed him.

**71CHEVYSHORTBED402** · 08-05-2021, 03:47 AM

https://www.tiktok.com/@subzerodenir...03031930342661

**richard2717** · 08-06-2021, 04:58 PM

butt

SCOTI · 08-06-2021, 05:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by richard2717

butt

Now this really got me chuckling

I'm curious who sat down & did the calculations. Gotta love those that think.

**FleetsidePaul** · 08-07-2021, 03:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SCOTI

Now this really got me chuckling

I'm curious who sat down & did the calculations. Gotta love those that think.

I'm sure that I'm missing something here but I don't get it?

**Getter-Done** · 08-07-2021, 04:45 AM

.
An 89 year old Ron Chester was stopped by the police around 2 a.m. and was asked where he was going at that time of night.

Ron replied, "I'm on my way to a lecture about alcohol abuse and the effects it has on the human body, as well as smoking and staying out late."

The officer asked, "Really? Who's giving that lecture at this time of night?"

Ron replied, "That would be my wife.

.

SCOTI · 08-07-2021, 12:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by FleetsidePaul

I'm sure that I'm missing something here but I don't get it?

The human body has an intake port for sustenance & a discharge 'port' for solids waste. The two ports are connected in between. Do some biology research for intestine lengths.

When one human body locks-lips (joins the intake ports) w/another human body, the exit port to exit port distance is quite long

**FleetsidePaul** · 08-07-2021, 12:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SCOTI

The human body has an intake port for sustenance & a discharge 'port' for solids waste. The two ports are connected in between. Do some biology research for intestine lengths.

When one human body locks-lips (joins the intake ports) w/another human body, the exit port to exit port distance is quite long

So I can tell my wife that it's longer than it looks??

**richard2717** · 08-07-2021, 04:25 PM

bless

**FleetsidePaul** · 08-08-2021, 05:06 AM

Why is a hemorrhoid called a hemorrhoid and an asteroid called an asteroid?

Shouldn't it be the other way around?

**Steeveedee** · 08-08-2021, 10:53 AM

Because then you would be pooping rocks, which wouldn't be an improvement.

**FleetsidePaul** · 08-08-2021, 04:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Steeveedee

Because then you would be pooping rocks, which wouldn't be an improvement.

You haven't seen my poop. Rocks would be an improvement.

It's not a pretty sight.

**Ol Blue K20** · 08-08-2021, 06:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by FleetsidePaul

You haven't seen my poop. Rocks would be an improvement.

It's not a pretty sight.

Aw $#*t.....more info than I needed/wanted!!

**FleetsidePaul** · 08-09-2021, 05:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ol Blue K20

Aw $#*t.....more info than I needed/wanted!!

Haha. Live with that visual baby!!

**Boog** · 08-09-2021, 07:49 AM

OMG! You're a rock star.

**Steeveedee** · 08-09-2021, 09:21 AM

It all makes sense, now. We had a new toilet put in at the rental house. The box showed a picture of a bunch of golf balls, which the toilet could still flush out of the bowl. Paul, did they base their design on your "input" (output)?

**FleetsidePaul** · 08-09-2021, 12:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Steeveedee

It all makes sense, now. We had a new toilet put in at the rental house. The box showed a picture of a bunch of golf balls, which the toilet could still flush out of the bowl. Paul, did they base their design on your "input" (output)?

No. They would need softballs not golf balls.

I asked my wife what she wanted for her birthday?

She said. "An outhouse'.

I asked why. I told her that she would never use an outhouse.

She said that she never would use it but I damn sure better.

**richard2717** · 08-09-2021, 04:08 PM

size

**FleetsidePaul** · 08-09-2021, 08:06 PM

A guy walks into a bar. There is a very fat girl in a short skirt dancing on a table.

He looks at her and says. Hey great legs.

She smiles. Do you really think so?

Sure. He nods. Most tables would have collapsed by now.

72 tigger · 08-09-2021, 09:28 PM

Happy Monday

**Steeveedee** · 08-09-2021, 09:43 PM

^ Well, the cage probably will protect him.

08-01-2021, 09:11 AM	#851
richard2717 Equal opportunity joke ofender Join Date: Oct 2011 Location: Eastern Shore of MD Posts: 10,126	Re: Joke Thread see Attached Images __________________ Members I have met. Dually Jams, OlBlue60, ScottH, Tommyboy24, Dujobo, Warbucket, 2003 Silverado, Notsolo, my90k5, 6t727t2, Special-K ,Jack_71C10, tabarcus,72blazer_mud_bogger,pwdcougar,RSavage,EricSean,1Rippen6,invicta455,tennaragtop71,arks, Kendal,Bennett68C10, Perpendicular, Chainsawman, McGeesCustomMinis,ShortbedClayton,longblue72,6768chevylover,Tim71,Travisarmenta,Ol' Drippy,fleetmitch,georgieb51,Dave,bcnya2,Dadsburb https://paypal.me/6772GMtruckparts Most women like the strong, silent type… Fortunately for me, my wife prefers the out-of-shape, mouthy type.

08-01-2021, 09:11 AM	#852
richard2717 Equal opportunity joke ofender Join Date: Oct 2011 Location: Eastern Shore of MD Posts: 10,126	Re: Joke Thread stole Attached Images __________________ Members I have met. Dually Jams, OlBlue60, ScottH, Tommyboy24, Dujobo, Warbucket, 2003 Silverado, Notsolo, my90k5, 6t727t2, Special-K ,Jack_71C10, tabarcus,72blazer_mud_bogger,pwdcougar,RSavage,EricSean,1Rippen6,invicta455,tennaragtop71,arks, Kendal,Bennett68C10, Perpendicular, Chainsawman, McGeesCustomMinis,ShortbedClayton,longblue72,6768chevylover,Tim71,Travisarmenta,Ol' Drippy,fleetmitch,georgieb51,Dave,bcnya2,Dadsburb https://paypal.me/6772GMtruckparts Most women like the strong, silent type… Fortunately for me, my wife prefers the out-of-shape, mouthy type.

08-01-2021, 11:42 AM	#854
richard2717 Equal opportunity joke ofender Join Date: Oct 2011 Location: Eastern Shore of MD Posts: 10,126	Re: Joke Thread miss Attached Images __________________ Members I have met. Dually Jams, OlBlue60, ScottH, Tommyboy24, Dujobo, Warbucket, 2003 Silverado, Notsolo, my90k5, 6t727t2, Special-K ,Jack_71C10, tabarcus,72blazer_mud_bogger,pwdcougar,RSavage,EricSean,1Rippen6,invicta455,tennaragtop71,arks, Kendal,Bennett68C10, Perpendicular, Chainsawman, McGeesCustomMinis,ShortbedClayton,longblue72,6768chevylover,Tim71,Travisarmenta,Ol' Drippy,fleetmitch,georgieb51,Dave,bcnya2,Dadsburb https://paypal.me/6772GMtruckparts Most women like the strong, silent type… Fortunately for me, my wife prefers the out-of-shape, mouthy type.

08-02-2021, 12:43 PM	#855
Steeveedee Who Changed This? Join Date: Jan 2013 Location: Simi Valley, CA Posts: 10,673	Re: Joke Thread This is horrible, but I still laughed- Judge: How could you kill 24 people? What is wrong with you? Driver: I was driving at 50mph when I saw two men crossing the road. On the roadside, there was a restaurant with outside seating. I wanted to apply the brakes, but I realized they were not working. So I had to take a decision: Either hit the 2 men or run into the restaurant. Judge: Hit the 2 men of course! Driver: Exactly! After hitting the first man, the other man ran inside the restaurant so l followed him. __________________ ~Steven '70 Chevy 3/4T Longhorn CST 402/400/3.56 Custom Camper Simi Valley, CA

08-05-2021, 03:47 AM	#856
71CHEVYSHORTBED402 Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: Northern Nevada Posts: 7,320	Re: Joke Thread https://www.tiktok.com/@subzerodenir...03031930342661 __________________ Tony 71 Custom Deluxe, SWB, 2WD, 402, A/C. I developed an assembly kit for restoring the (a) truck from the ground up. My build thread, and more on the assembly kit https://67-72chevytrucks.com/vboard/...d.php?t=730025

08-06-2021, 04:58 PM	#857
richard2717 Equal opportunity joke ofender Join Date: Oct 2011 Location: Eastern Shore of MD Posts: 10,126	Re: Joke Thread butt Attached Images __________________ Members I have met. Dually Jams, OlBlue60, ScottH, Tommyboy24, Dujobo, Warbucket, 2003 Silverado, Notsolo, my90k5, 6t727t2, Special-K ,Jack_71C10, tabarcus,72blazer_mud_bogger,pwdcougar,RSavage,EricSean,1Rippen6,invicta455,tennaragtop71,arks, Kendal,Bennett68C10, Perpendicular, Chainsawman, McGeesCustomMinis,ShortbedClayton,longblue72,6768chevylover,Tim71,Travisarmenta,Ol' Drippy,fleetmitch,georgieb51,Dave,bcnya2,Dadsburb https://paypal.me/6772GMtruckparts Most women like the strong, silent type… Fortunately for me, my wife prefers the out-of-shape, mouthy type.

08-07-2021, 04:45 AM	#860
Getter-Done Senior Member Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: TN. Posts: 8,403	Re: Joke Thread . An 89 year old Ron Chester was stopped by the police around 2 a.m. and was asked where he was going at that time of night. Ron replied, "I'm on my way to a lecture about alcohol abuse and the effects it has on the human body, as well as smoking and staying out late." The officer asked, "Really? Who's giving that lecture at this time of night?" Ron replied, "That would be my wife. . __________________ ________________________________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________ 84 Chevy K-20 63 Impala (my high school car) http://67-72chevytrucks.com/vboard/s...Crew Cab Build

08-07-2021, 04:25 PM	#863
richard2717 Equal opportunity joke ofender Join Date: Oct 2011 Location: Eastern Shore of MD Posts: 10,126	Re: Joke Thread bless Attached Images __________________ Members I have met. Dually Jams, OlBlue60, ScottH, Tommyboy24, Dujobo, Warbucket, 2003 Silverado, Notsolo, my90k5, 6t727t2, Special-K ,Jack_71C10, tabarcus,72blazer_mud_bogger,pwdcougar,RSavage,EricSean,1Rippen6,invicta455,tennaragtop71,arks, Kendal,Bennett68C10, Perpendicular, Chainsawman, McGeesCustomMinis,ShortbedClayton,longblue72,6768chevylover,Tim71,Travisarmenta,Ol' Drippy,fleetmitch,georgieb51,Dave,bcnya2,Dadsburb https://paypal.me/6772GMtruckparts Most women like the strong, silent type… Fortunately for me, my wife prefers the out-of-shape, mouthy type.

08-08-2021, 05:06 AM	#864
FleetsidePaul R.I.P. E.S.L.L. Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Kernville CA./ Lake Isabella CA. Posts: 11,418	Re: Joke Thread Why is a hemorrhoid called a hemorrhoid and an asteroid called an asteroid? Shouldn't it be the other way around? __________________ 1971 Custom C/20 1970 CST 20 1970 C/30 Flatbed 1983 C/30 Dually 2015 Corvette Z51 2021 Corvette Z51 1991 Cadillac Hearse 1982 Cadillac Eldorado Biarritz 2000 Porsche Boxster S 2020 Jeep Gladiator 1973 VW Thing 1973 Plymouth Satellite wagon 1963 Baja Bug 1959 Bug Dune Buggy 1970 Baja Bug 1987 Jaguar XJ 350. R.I.P. El Jay R.I.P Jessie. R.I.P Grumpy. Every day is a gift from God.

08-08-2021, 10:53 AM	#865
Steeveedee Who Changed This? Join Date: Jan 2013 Location: Simi Valley, CA Posts: 10,673	Re: Joke Thread Because then you would be pooping rocks, which wouldn't be an improvement. __________________ ~Steven '70 Chevy 3/4T Longhorn CST 402/400/3.56 Custom Camper Simi Valley, CA

08-09-2021, 07:49 AM	#869
Boog laying low Join Date: Mar 2001 Location: Searcy, Ark. USA Posts: 13,513	Re: Joke Thread OMG! You're a rock star. __________________ Boog 69 Chevy stepside, 358/T350, 4.11 posi, 4.5/4 drop, rallys, poboy driver primer is finer 91 Chevy sportside, Tahoe, Yukon & GMC Crewcab All GM..'nuff said. I stand for the flag and kneel at the cross

08-09-2021, 09:21 AM	#870
Steeveedee Who Changed This? Join Date: Jan 2013 Location: Simi Valley, CA Posts: 10,673	Re: Joke Thread It all makes sense, now. We had a new toilet put in at the rental house. The box showed a picture of a bunch of golf balls, which the toilet could still flush out of the bowl. Paul, did they base their design on your "input" (output)? __________________ ~Steven '70 Chevy 3/4T Longhorn CST 402/400/3.56 Custom Camper Simi Valley, CA

08-09-2021, 04:08 PM	#872
richard2717 Equal opportunity joke ofender Join Date: Oct 2011 Location: Eastern Shore of MD Posts: 10,126	Re: Joke Thread size Attached Images __________________ Members I have met. Dually Jams, OlBlue60, ScottH, Tommyboy24, Dujobo, Warbucket, 2003 Silverado, Notsolo, my90k5, 6t727t2, Special-K ,Jack_71C10, tabarcus,72blazer_mud_bogger,pwdcougar,RSavage,EricSean,1Rippen6,invicta455,tennaragtop71,arks, Kendal,Bennett68C10, Perpendicular, Chainsawman, McGeesCustomMinis,ShortbedClayton,longblue72,6768chevylover,Tim71,Travisarmenta,Ol' Drippy,fleetmitch,georgieb51,Dave,bcnya2,Dadsburb https://paypal.me/6772GMtruckparts Most women like the strong, silent type… Fortunately for me, my wife prefers the out-of-shape, mouthy type.

08-09-2021, 08:06 PM	#873
FleetsidePaul R.I.P. E.S.L.L. Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Kernville CA./ Lake Isabella CA. Posts: 11,418	Re: Joke Thread A guy walks into a bar. There is a very fat girl in a short skirt dancing on a table. He looks at her and says. Hey great legs. She smiles. Do you really think so? Sure. He nods. Most tables would have collapsed by now. __________________ 1971 Custom C/20 1970 CST 20 1970 C/30 Flatbed 1983 C/30 Dually 2015 Corvette Z51 2021 Corvette Z51 1991 Cadillac Hearse 1982 Cadillac Eldorado Biarritz 2000 Porsche Boxster S 2020 Jeep Gladiator 1973 VW Thing 1973 Plymouth Satellite wagon 1963 Baja Bug 1959 Bug Dune Buggy 1970 Baja Bug 1987 Jaguar XJ 350. R.I.P. El Jay R.I.P Jessie. R.I.P Grumpy. Every day is a gift from God.

08-09-2021, 09:28 PM	#874
72 tigger Registered User Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: Berne IN Posts: 3,250	Re: Joke Thread Happy Monday Attached Images __________________ 71 C10 72 K20 72 K10 Super Kirk



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08-09-2021, 09:43 PM	#875
Steeveedee Who Changed This? Join Date: Jan 2013 Location: Simi Valley, CA Posts: 10,673	Re: Joke Thread ^ Well, the cage probably will protect him. __________________ ~Steven '70 Chevy 3/4T Longhorn CST 402/400/3.56 Custom Camper Simi Valley, CA

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