Old guy sayings, - Page 4 - The 1947 - Present Chevrolet & GMC Truck Message Board Network

Mongo · 10-05-2005, 04:03 PM

He's about bright as a 5w light bulb shining at high noon.

Putter · 10-05-2005, 04:08 PM

That boy is about two sparks short of a campfire!

1969 C/K CST · 10-05-2005, 04:14 PM

Boy that girl was ugly. Had teeth like a 4 year old mule.

1969 C/K CST · 10-05-2005, 04:25 PM

Old farmer gets a visit from a city slicker who comments on the smell around there. Farmers reply-Smells like money.

jhwkns · 10-05-2005, 04:43 PM

"If I wanted any $hit out of you I'd squeeze your head"

blue_92 · 10-05-2005, 05:14 PM

My dad's favorite when I did work for him. The pays not much but the hours are long.

wright-ons · 10-05-2005, 07:00 PM

A man doesn't have to have two wives to have one to many. Useless as a screen door on a submarine, Hire a kid while he still knows it all.

wright-ons · 10-05-2005, 08:05 PM

One more then I'm done. When I asked my dad for some money one time , he said "Son, right now if it took ten cents to ride down the Mississippi on a river boat, I would have to run up and down the bank yelling, isn't that cheep". I didn't get the money.

kingsolver72 · 10-05-2005, 09:20 PM

Colder than a well digger's a$$.
Its colder than a witch's T!^# y in a brass bra.
She could suck the chrome off a bumper.
It could be raining women and you would get hit by a queer.
That toilet will suck the hair off your arse.

*FUNMUDDER* · 10-05-2005, 09:41 PM

Don't amount to nothin' but a pisshole in the snow

charlieo · 10-05-2005, 09:49 PM

When we were in puberty my friends dad would say something like "Did you leave any peter tracks " ?

*FUNMUDDER* · 10-05-2005, 09:50 PM

ROFLMAO

Brainchild · 10-05-2005, 10:16 PM

Quote:

It could be raining women and you would get hit by a queer.

:LMAO that's funny

Been there,done that,got the T-shirt

Leinie · 10-05-2005, 10:46 PM

You can't bu11$hit a Bu11$hitter

modifiedGMC · 10-05-2005, 11:32 PM

I remember hearing....
" That's about as usless as a windshield wiper on a billy goats butt!"
" Eat $h!+ and bark at the moon!"
" That was slicker than owl grease"
" We buy you books, and buy you books and all you do is eat the covers off"

if you got between my dad and the TV while he was watching it he'd say
" Your daddy wasn't a glass maker and your butt don't have no window!"

My mom asked my dad one day " Where can we go to get out of the house?" to which he replied "Out in the yard!"

kingsolver72 · 10-06-2005, 01:06 AM

"Drive it like you stoled it"....O.K. that is a newer one.
Thats as useless as Rossie O'donald with a rape whistle.
This one is about a loose woman that got pregnent ."If you backed up to a chain saw,would you know what tooth hit you?
"Buy them books and buy them books and what do they do,they eat the teachers",is the way I heard it.
If,ifs were fifths,we would all be drunk.
If ,ifs and nuts were candy and buts,what a Merry Christmas we all would have.
You make a better door than a window.

kingsolver72 · 10-06-2005, 01:17 AM

With friends like you who needs enemies?
This is one that my father-in-law says: "You don't need enemies you've got family".
Your so ugly the doctor slap your momma.
You are the only living abortion I have ever seen.
You are so bucked tooth you could eat squash through a picket fence.
He is uglier than 40 miles of muddy road.

sneakysnake · 10-06-2005, 09:44 AM

"I knew you, when you was a gleem in your momma's eye."
"Best part of you ran down your momma's leg."

Putter · 10-06-2005, 09:55 AM

Back in Jr. High, when we used to walk inside at my friend's house, his dad would ask:
"What do you know good?"

We'd reply "Nothin' much"

He'd always say "Well, what about P#$$y and watermellon? Them's pretty good!"

*gn4u2c* · 10-06-2005, 10:04 AM

Anytime I said something back to my pops ~"I ain't the best but the best don't fukc with me" maybe you shouldn't either

TOMMAY · 10-06-2005, 10:14 AM

"Dumber in the head than a hog is in the butt."
"Even an ol' blind hog finds an acorn every once in a while.'
"Old as the hills."
"Ugly as a mud fence."
"Ass,two axe handles wide."
"So broke I can't pay attention."
"If he's not good for anything else,you can always use him for a bad example."
"Why is there never enough time to do it right the first time,but always enough time to do it over again."
"Crooked as a dogs hind leg."
"Blind in one eye an' can't see out of the other."
"Couln't hit a bull in the ass with a base fiddle."
"Dumb as a rock."

Eyegore · 10-06-2005, 10:42 AM

"that is bad as stink on a stick"
"if it hurts when you do that, then don't do that"
(for someone driving by in a beat up car) - "I hope no one got hurt in that wreck"
"picture is worth a 1000 words"

Zumo · 10-06-2005, 10:46 AM

My Dad used to say:
"About as useless as a set of t1ts on a bore."

Zumo · 10-06-2005, 10:52 AM

Think of all of thes said by Foghorn Leghorn. They all sound like something he would say.

wright-ons · 10-06-2005, 11:28 AM

Smother than a gravy sandwitch

10-05-2005, 04:03 PM	#76
Mongo YES_____NO Join Date: Jul 1999 Location: Somewhere in the vicinity of betelgeuse Posts: 7,351	He's about bright as a 5w light bulb shining at high noon. __________________ People many not remember what you said or what you did, but they will remember the way you made them feel. - unknown Cause, remember: no matter where you go... there you are. - Buckaroo Banzai 1984 Help support the board

10-05-2005, 04:08 PM	#77
Putter More Cowbell.... Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: Puckett, MS Posts: 3,569	That boy is about two sparks short of a campfire! __________________ *There once was a member from Puckett.....Who ( fill in the blank blank blank* ) bucket**

10-05-2005, 04:14 PM	#78
1969 C/K CST A.K.A- Crummy Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: NC foothills Posts: 3,025	Boy that girl was ugly. Had teeth like a 4 year old mule. __________________ 2003 Silverado Z71 Are fishermen all liars?

10-05-2005, 04:25 PM	#79
1969 C/K CST A.K.A- Crummy Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: NC foothills Posts: 3,025	Old farmer gets a visit from a city slicker who comments on the smell around there. Farmers reply-Smells like money. __________________ 2003 Silverado Z71 Are fishermen all liars?

10-05-2005, 04:43 PM	#80
jhwkns Registered Cruiser Join Date: May 2002 Location: Las Vegas NV Posts: 2,230	"If I wanted any $hit out of you I'd squeeze your head" __________________ I intend to live forever. So far, so good.

10-05-2005, 05:14 PM	#81
blue_92 Registered User Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Princeton, British Columbia Posts: 33	My dad's favorite when I did work for him. The pays not much but the hours are long. __________________ 92 chev 4x4 Almost 400,000 kms (well it's over now) It's mine and its paid for

10-05-2005, 07:00 PM	#82
wright-ons Registered User Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Central CA Posts: 20	A man doesn't have to have two wives to have one to many. Useless as a screen door on a submarine, Hire a kid while he still knows it all.

10-05-2005, 08:05 PM	#83
wright-ons Registered User Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Central CA Posts: 20	One more then I'm done. When I asked my dad for some money one time , he said "Son, right now if it took ten cents to ride down the Mississippi on a river boat, I would have to run up and down the bank yelling, isn't that cheep". I didn't get the money.

10-05-2005, 09:20 PM	#84
kingsolver72 10/30/19 Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: ottawa kansas Posts: 5,287	Colder than a well digger's a$$. Its colder than a witch's T!^# y in a brass bra. She could suck the chrome off a bumper. It could be raining women and you would get hit by a queer. That toilet will suck the hair off your arse. __________________ Fight the good fight, finish the race, keep the faith

10-05-2005, 09:41 PM	#85
FUNMUDDER Account Suspended Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Maine Posts: 427	Don't amount to nothin' but a pisshole in the snow

10-05-2005, 09:49 PM	#86
charlieo Registered User Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: sw Posts: 341	When we were in puberty my friends dad would say something like "Did you leave any peter tracks " ?

10-05-2005, 09:50 PM	#87
FUNMUDDER Account Suspended Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Maine Posts: 427	ROFLMAO

10-05-2005, 10:46 PM	#89
Leinie Registered User Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: USA Posts: 2,613	You can't bu11$hit a Bu11$hitter

10-05-2005, 11:32 PM	#90
modifiedGMC Registered User Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Walker Co. Alabama Posts: 474	I remember hearing.... " That's about as usless as a windshield wiper on a billy goats butt!" " Eat $h!+ and bark at the moon!" " That was slicker than owl grease" " We buy you books, and buy you books and all you do is eat the covers off" if you got between my dad and the TV while he was watching it he'd say " Your daddy wasn't a glass maker and your butt don't have no window!" My mom asked my dad one day " Where can we go to get out of the house?" to which he replied "Out in the yard!" __________________ If it don't fit, force it,...If it still don't fit , modify it 'till it does fit !!!

10-06-2005, 01:06 AM	#91
kingsolver72 10/30/19 Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: ottawa kansas Posts: 5,287	"Drive it like you stoled it"....O.K. that is a newer one. Thats as useless as Rossie O'donald with a rape whistle. This one is about a loose woman that got pregnent ."If you backed up to a chain saw,would you know what tooth hit you? "Buy them books and buy them books and what do they do,they eat the teachers",is the way I heard it. If,ifs were fifths,we would all be drunk. If ,ifs and nuts were candy and buts,what a Merry Christmas we all would have. You make a better door than a window. __________________ Fight the good fight, finish the race, keep the faith Last edited by kingsolver72; 10-06-2005 at 01:08 AM.



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10-06-2005, 01:17 AM	#92
kingsolver72 10/30/19 Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: ottawa kansas Posts: 5,287	With friends like you who needs enemies? This is one that my father-in-law says: "You don't need enemies you've got family". Your so ugly the doctor slap your momma. You are the only living abortion I have ever seen. You are so bucked tooth you could eat squash through a picket fence. He is uglier than 40 miles of muddy road. __________________ Fight the good fight, finish the race, keep the faith

10-06-2005, 09:44 AM	#93
sneakysnake It's a catastrophic success. Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: Oklahoma Posts: 2,077	"I knew you, when you was a gleem in your momma's eye." "Best part of you ran down your momma's leg."

10-06-2005, 09:55 AM	#94
Putter More Cowbell.... Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: Puckett, MS Posts: 3,569	Back in Jr. High, when we used to walk inside at my friend's house, his dad would ask: "What do you know good?" We'd reply "Nothin' much" He'd always say "Well, what about P#$$y and watermellon? Them's pretty good!" __________________ *There once was a member from Puckett.....Who ( fill in the blank blank blank* ) bucket**

10-06-2005, 10:04 AM	#95
gn4u2c Account Suspended Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: southern pa Posts: 698	Anytime I said something back to my pops ~"I ain't the best but the best don't fukc with me" maybe you shouldn't either

10-06-2005, 10:14 AM	#96
TOMMAY Registered User Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: Mobile,Al Posts: 163	"Dumber in the head than a hog is in the butt." "Even an ol' blind hog finds an acorn every once in a while.' "Old as the hills." "Ugly as a mud fence." "Ass,two axe handles wide." "So broke I can't pay attention." "If he's not good for anything else,you can always use him for a bad example." "Why is there never enough time to do it right the first time,but always enough time to do it over again." "Crooked as a dogs hind leg." "Blind in one eye an' can't see out of the other." "Couln't hit a bull in the ass with a base fiddle." "Dumb as a rock." __________________ 76 Silverado 74 Vette

10-06-2005, 10:42 AM	#97
Eyegore What Hump? Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: New River AZ Posts: 2,009	"that is bad as stink on a stick" "if it hurts when you do that, then don't do that" (for someone driving by in a beat up car) - "I hope no one got hurt in that wreck" "picture is worth a 1000 words" __________________ Lil red 86 c-10 99 Sub 78 Camper Special w/ 454

10-06-2005, 10:46 AM	#98
Zumo Hot Rods For Life Join Date: Sep 2001 Location: Waxahachie, TX Posts: 3,305	My Dad used to say: "About as useless as a set of t1ts on a bore." __________________ 1968 C10 LWB **SOLD* Andy Viva Los Bicicletas! Los Muertos Custom Bicycles

10-06-2005, 10:52 AM	#99
Zumo Hot Rods For Life Join Date: Sep 2001 Location: Waxahachie, TX Posts: 3,305	Think of all of thes said by Foghorn Leghorn. They all sound like something he would say. __________________ 1968 C10 LWB **SOLD* Andy Viva Los Bicicletas! Los Muertos Custom Bicycles Last edited by Zumo; 10-06-2005 at 10:53 AM.

10-06-2005, 11:28 AM	#100
wright-ons Registered User Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Central CA Posts: 20	Smother than a gravy sandwitch

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