Joke Thread

[richard2717]

nnnn

[richard2717]

Can Cold Water Clean Dishes? This is for all the germ conscious folks that worry about using cold water to clean.
John went to visit his 90 year old grandfather in a very secluded, rural area of Saskatchewan .
After spending a great evening chatting the night away, the next morning John's grandfather prepared breakfast of bacon, eggs and toast.
However, John noticed a film like substance on his plate, and questioned
his grandfather asking,
'Are these plates clean?'
His grandfather replied,
'They're as clean as cold water can get em. Just you go ahead and finish your meal, Sonny!'
For lunch the old man made hamburgers.
Again, John was concerned about the plates, as his appeared to have tiny specks around
the edge that looked like dried egg and asked,
'Are you sure these plates are clean?'
Without looking up the old man said,
'I told you before, Sonny, those dishes are as clean as cold water can get them. Now don't you fret, I don't want to hear another word about it!'
Later that afternoon, John was on his way to a nearby town and as he was leaving, his grandfather's dog started to growl, and wouldn't let him pass.
John yelled and said, 'Grandfather, your dog won't let me get to my car'.
Without diverting his attention from the football game he was watching on TV, the old man shouted!
'Coldwater, go lay down now, yah hear me!'

[65truckowner]

[68bowtie]

Yeah my grandma totally did that. Not cool.

[Sheepdip]

Originally Posted by 68bowtie

Yeah my grandma totally did that. Not cool.

Had some old family friends, both long gone now, she would put the butter dish down for the cat to lick then put it back on the table!

Needless to say, we always ate before we went to visit them. Gross stuff there.

[LT7A]

Originally Posted by Sheepdip

Had some old family friends, both long gone now, she would put the butter dish down for the cat to lick then put it back on the table!

Needless to say, we always ate before we went to visit them. Gross stuff there.

Hahaha, so nasty. Things like that just seem not to occur to be an issue to some people. I have some good friends who are clients, both ran medical practices. They were invited to dinner at one of the physicians' homes; he was the managing partner of one of the practices. He and his wife raised tropical birds and kept the cages in the kitchen...
Smart man, nice guy, good doctor, but seriously, a bunch of birds where you prepare your food?!?

But the cat thing wins, yuck!

[Ol Blue K20]

Who would name their dog Coldwater?

[richard2717]

gene

[richard2717]

Mule Trading
Boudreaux & Thibodeaux saw an ad in the Starkville Daily in Pearl River , LA. and bought a mule for $100.
The farmer agreed to deliver the mule the next day.
The next morning the farmer drove up and said, “Sorry, fellows, I have some bad news, the mule died last night."
Boudreaux & Thibodeaux replied, “Well, then just give us our money back."
The farmer said, “Can’t do that. I went and spent it already."
They said, "OK then, just bring us the dead mule."
The farmer asked, "What in the world ya'll gonna do with a dead mule?"
Boudreaux said, "We gonna raffle him off."
The farmer said, "You can't raffle off a dead mule!"
Thibodeaux said, "We shore can! Heck, we don't hafta tell nobody he's dead!"
A couple of weeks later, the farmer ran into Boudreaux & Thibodeaux at the Piggly Wiggly grocery store and asked.
"What'd you fellers ever do with that dead mule?"
They said, “We raffled him off like we said we wuz gonna do."
Leroy said,
"Shucks, we sold 500 tickets fer two dollars apiece and made a profit of $998."
The farmer said, “My Lord, didn't anyone complain?"
Boudreaux said, "Well, the feller who won got upset. So we gave him his two dollars back."
Boudreaux and Thibodeaux now work for the government.
They're overseeing the Bailout & Stimulus Programs.

[richard2717]

post

[Ol Blue K20]

Originally Posted by richard2717

Mule Trading
Boudreaux & Thibodeaux saw an ad in the Starkville Daily in Pearl River , LA. and bought a mule for $100.
The farmer agreed to deliver the mule the next day.
The next morning the farmer drove up and said, “Sorry, fellows, I have some bad news, the mule died last night."
Boudreaux & Thibodeaux replied, “Well, then just give us our money back."
The farmer said, “Can’t do that. I went and spent it already."
They said, "OK then, just bring us the dead mule."
The farmer asked, "What in the world ya'll gonna do with a dead mule?"
Boudreaux said, "We gonna raffle him off."
The farmer said, "You can't raffle off a dead mule!"
Thibodeaux said, "We shore can! Heck, we don't hafta tell nobody he's dead!"
A couple of weeks later, the farmer ran into Boudreaux & Thibodeaux at the Piggly Wiggly grocery store and asked.
"What'd you fellers ever do with that dead mule?"
They said, “We raffled him off like we said we wuz gonna do."
Leroy said,
"Shucks, we sold 500 tickets fer two dollars apiece and made a profit of $998."
The farmer said, “My Lord, didn't anyone complain?"
Boudreaux said, "Well, the feller who won got upset. So we gave him his two dollars back."
Boudreaux and Thibodeaux now work for the government.
They're overseeing the Bailout & Stimulus Programs.

Originally Posted by richard2717

post

Oh these are great!

[Palf70Step]

[Ol Blue K20]

Originally Posted by Palf70Step

[davischevy]

Originally Posted by Palf70Step

It looks like you took that picture close to home.

[truckster]

I honestly didn't know he was still alive...

[Boog]

Need gas?

[72c20customcamper]

...

[HotRod4me]

Lol

[richards72chevy]

FB_IMG_1643853950774.jpg

[Boog]

So cold

[Palf70Step]

...

[Palf70Step]

...

[Boog]

You know the ones

[72c20customcamper]

Good old days

[Palf70Step]

...