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Old 04-30-2024, 09:04 PM   #1
HO455
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Re: Joke Thread

I vote photoshop.
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Old 04-30-2024, 10:24 PM   #2
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Re: Joke Thread

Quote:
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I vote photoshop.
Yeah, probably!
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Old 04-30-2024, 10:40 PM   #3
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Re: Joke Thread

Well at least they stopped for the School Bus.

If only they would have Aired the tires up with 10 more PSI on the Passengers side.

The Unloading process is
A Jack in the center of the bed.

Then 4 sets of cribbage.


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Old 04-30-2024, 11:13 PM   #4
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Re: Joke Thread

I agree that a forklift would have been used to load it. I prefer to think that the unloading plan was about a dozen buddies and a few cases of beer.
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Old 05-04-2024, 10:38 AM   #5
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Re: Joke Thread

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Old 05-04-2024, 10:51 AM   #6
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Re: Joke Thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by Getter-Done View Post
It's a good thing there were only 3 channels.....
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Old 05-04-2024, 11:02 AM   #7
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Re: Joke Thread

Yeah, but we surfed those 3 channels a lot and didn't know we were surfing.
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Old 05-04-2024, 11:10 AM   #8
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Re: Joke Thread

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Yeah, but we surfed those 3 channels a lot and didn't know we were surfing.
That's for sure....it made me think, what if we'd had 400 channels like there is now?
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Old 05-05-2024, 04:57 PM   #9
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Re: Joke Thread

dino
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Old 05-05-2024, 08:52 PM   #10
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Re: Joke Thread

Neigh

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Old 05-05-2024, 10:09 PM   #11
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Re: Joke Thread

I showed the one above to the wife and got a laugh. Hard to do.
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Old 05-06-2024, 11:40 AM   #12
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Re: Joke Thread

One of life's conundrums.

In the past, the Pony Express, using relays of men & horses, could get mail from Missouri to California (~ 2000 miles) in about 10 days, or an average of about 200 miles/ day.

Recently, I had a USPS Priority Mail 9x12 envelope (claiming 1-3 days for delivery) travel ~700 miles in 14 days, or an average of about 50 miles/ day.

So much for "Neither snow, nor rain, nor heat, nor gloom of night, stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed rounds".
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1967 Burban (the WMB),1988 S10 Blazer (the Stink10 II),1969 GTO (the Goat), 1970 Javelin, 1952 F2 Ford OHC six 4X4, 29 Model A, 72 Firebird (the DBP Bird). 85 Alfa Romeo
If it breaks I didn't want it in the first place
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Old 05-06-2024, 11:42 AM   #13
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Re: Joke Thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by HO455 View Post
Police car loses wheels to thief! Cops are working tirelessly to nab suspect
But they have nothing to go with.

K
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Old 05-06-2024, 03:33 PM   #14
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Re: Joke Thread

I recently sent off a package to Florida (USPS priority). It arrived in 3 days, then promptly headed north up to Maine only to get sent back to Florida and again return to Maine. Sat in Maine for 5 days before getting sent back to Florida and took another 4 days to get to the customer. I figure the package traveled well over 5000 miles and took 13-14 days
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Old 05-06-2024, 04:39 PM   #15
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Re: Joke Thread

I had a USPS package that was sent to me in Utah from California. Somehow it wnet threough eastern Europe before I received it 2 1/2 months later.
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Old 05-07-2024, 11:53 PM   #16
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Re: Joke Thread

Truth
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Old 05-09-2024, 12:44 PM   #17
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Re: Joke Thread

.....
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Old 05-10-2024, 12:10 PM   #18
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Re: Joke Thread

Now the warmer weather is arriving.
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RIP Bob Parks.
1967 Burban (the WMB),1988 S10 Blazer (the Stink10 II),1969 GTO (the Goat), 1970 Javelin, 1952 F2 Ford OHC six 4X4, 29 Model A, 72 Firebird (the DBP Bird). 85 Alfa Romeo
If it breaks I didn't want it in the first place
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Old 05-10-2024, 12:40 PM   #19
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Re: Joke Thread

^^^^ Duh,
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Old 05-10-2024, 09:08 PM   #20
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Re: Joke Thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by HO455 View Post
Now the warmer weather is arriving.
That almost makes enough sense that I could see someone trying it.
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Old 05-12-2024, 08:03 AM   #21
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Re: Joke Thread

The young woman who submitted the tech support message below (about her relationship to her partner) presumably did it as a joke.
Then she got a reply that was way too good to keep to herself.
The tech support people's love advice was hilarious and genius!
The query:
Dear Tech Support,
Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slowdown in overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.
In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, and then installed undesirable programs such as: NBA 5.0, NFL 3.0 and Golf Clubs 4.1.
Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and House cleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. Please note that I have tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.
What can I do?
Signed, Desperate
The response (that came weeks later out of the blue):
Dear Desperate,
First keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system. Please enter command: I thought you loved me.html and try to download Tears 6.2. Do not forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update. If that application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.
However, remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0, or Beer 6.1. Please note that Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will download the Snoring Loudly Beta version.
Whatever you do, DO NOT, under any circumstances, install Mother-In-Law 1.0 as it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources.
In addition, please do not attempt to re-install the Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0. In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly.
You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance.
We recommend Cooking 3.0.
Good Luck!
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Old 05-12-2024, 09:39 AM   #22
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Re: Joke Thread

That’s the funniest thing I’ve ever read
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Old 05-12-2024, 12:40 PM   #23
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Re: Joke Thread

four
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Old 05-12-2024, 03:15 PM   #24
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Re: Joke Thread

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four
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Old 05-12-2024, 07:25 PM   #25
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Re: Joke Thread

How 'bout it?
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