Joke Thread

[Getter-Done]

[special-K]

That's right. Only stupid if it didn't work and plum lucky when it did. Cool truck. I'd do what I could to make that happen

[special-K]

Originally Posted by Getter-Done

And FS is (For Sure) right?

I thought it meant Fat Sh!t

[Shifty One]

Originally Posted by Getter-Done

Attachment 2328000

Seems legit...

[special-K]

Originally Posted by kwmech

This reminds of a scene in the series MASH when Alan Alda does a couple of sentences using nothing but Acronyms

me and a guy who worked for me in the '80s would go on like that. It all started when I first saw a Toyota MR2. I'd say 'MR2?" and he'd answer SAR, then go on from there with TLAs that sound like three words, like BOK

I worked on a woman's place who was an editor of some paper. She used FYI constantly. That's one you can throw in front or in the middle of most anything you say, front, middle, or back. It was very annoying, FYI. Old Blu 80 lived next door and I asked him if there were any FYI addiction treatment centers nearby

[richard2717]

nana

[HO455]

Originally Posted by Getter-Done

Attachment 2328000

Another person confused about the definitions of lucky and intelligent.

[Getter-Done]

[Getter-Done]

[richard2717]

Last week, my neighbor asked me, "seeing that our houses have the same floor plan and square footage, can I ask how many rolls of wallpaper did you buy to do your family room?"
"Thirteen," I replied.
Today, he came over looking upset and said, "I've got three rolls of wallpaper left over!"
"So did I" I replied!

[Boog]

^^^^^

[richard2717]

fear

[richard2717]

wok

[richard2717]

"Your Girl is worried about you talking to Kayla on Snapchat. My Wife is worried I'm talking to Leon on Facebook Marketplace about a '71 Chevy Cheyenne Truck that 'ran when parked' and just needs floor pans. We are not the same."


.

[HO455]

Originally Posted by richard2717

"Your Girl is worried about you talking to Kayla on Snapchat. My Wife is worried I'm talking to Leon on Facebook Marketplace about a '71 Chevy Cheyenne Truck that 'ran when parked' and just needs floor pans. We are not the same."


.

Wait! Leon's got his Cheyenne for sale????
How did I miss that?

[special-K]

Originally Posted by richard2717

Last week, my neighbor asked me, "seeing that our houses have the same floor plan and square footage, can I ask how many rolls of wallpaper did you buy to do your family room?"
"Thirteen," I replied.
Today, he came over looking upset and said, "I've got three rolls of wallpaper left over!"
"So did I" I replied!

My kind of humor

[richard2717]

Bagpipes at a Funeral
As a bagpiper, I play many gigs. Recently I was asked by a funeral director to play at a graveside service for a homeless man. He had no family or friends, so the service was to be at a pauper's cemetery in the Kentucky back country.
As I was not familiar with the backwoods, I got lost and, being a typical man, I didn't stop for directions.
I finally arrived an hour late and saw the funeral guy had evidently gone and the hearse was nowhere in sight. There were only the diggers and crew left and they were eating lunch.
I felt badly and apologized to the men for being late. I went to the side of the grave and looked down and the vault lid was already in place. I didn't know what else to do, so I started to play.
The workers put down their lunches and began to gather around. I played out my heart and soul for this man with no family and friends. Played like I've never played before for this homeless man.
And as I played 'Amazing Grace,' the workers began to weep. They wept, I wept. We all wept together. When I finished I packed up my bagpipes and started for my car. Though my head hung low, my heart was full.
As I opened the door to my car, I heard one of the workers say, "I never seen nothin' like that before and I've been putting in septic tanks for twenty years."
Apparently I'm still lost.... it's a man thing.

[Getter-Done]

I was a Cowboys fan in the 80's
So this would be about right??

[richard2717]

due

[Boog]

Originally Posted by richard2717

Bagpipes at a Funeral
As a bagpiper, I play many gigs. Recently I was asked by a funeral director to play at a graveside service for a homeless man. He had no family or friends, so the service was to be at a pauper's cemetery in the Kentucky back country.
As I was not familiar with the backwoods, I got lost and, being a typical man, I didn't stop for directions.
I finally arrived an hour late and saw the funeral guy had evidently gone and the hearse was nowhere in sight. There were only the diggers and crew left and they were eating lunch.
I felt badly and apologized to the men for being late. I went to the side of the grave and looked down and the vault lid was already in place. I didn't know what else to do, so I started to play.
The workers put down their lunches and began to gather around. I played out my heart and soul for this man with no family and friends. Played like I've never played before for this homeless man.
And as I played 'Amazing Grace,' the workers began to weep. They wept, I wept. We all wept together. When I finished I packed up my bagpipes and started for my car. Though my head hung low, my heart was full.
As I opened the door to my car, I heard one of the workers say, "I never seen nothin' like that before and I've been putting in septic tanks for twenty years."
Apparently I'm still lost.... it's a man thing.

smiff. That was bee you tee full.

[Boog]

Art and cheer leaders. ummm um.

[Getter-Done]

[richard2717]

no snitch

[richard2717]

procharge

[Getter-Done]